Just When I thought I was movin on....
Find a Conversation
| Fri, 11-28-2003 - 7:38am |
So I work with him and everyday I see him is torture, but I try to move on. I'm starting to eat and sleep again, thank god. But something happened this week that is making me go steps back....
I had a Yahoo account and someone got into it. They tampered with all my stuff, including a personal e-mail to a friend of mine, who I told about the A. I think it's my husband because I has this e-mail account when I was still with him and he prob found the password. The sicko who got into my e-mail then sent the e-mail to people my xMM knows (although I didn't have their e-mail addresses so I don't know how this person sent them)! Now I am facewd with returned nasty e-mails from people I don't know, and some that I did know from xMM. They are calling me a whore, other nasty names, that he always loved his wife and I was just a fling, and I meant nothing to him. I should copy what they have written about me and show you.
I found out about the e-mails because while I was sleeping Thanksgiving eve, at 3:40 am, xMM calls my cell, and he starts speaking to me and I hang up on him because I told him I don't want to speak to him. He called again and I didn't answer. I went to send him an e-mail to not contact me anymore, and I go online and find the nasty e-mail trails! I then caled his house, his W answers and I say "your husband keeps calling and please tell him to stop" Well couple of minutes later he called again and I picked up and said "please leave me alone!" and hung up. I then sent him a cease and desist letter to he and his W. I'm guessing he called because someone told him about these bizarre e-mails.
Just when I started to feel better about myself, and tried to move on for the holidays, this "Jerry Springer" crap happens. The things they said about me, judging me, and refinforce that I meant nothing to xMM is making me feel terrible about myself-- for getting involved (he told me he was leaving his W), and for not knowing a jerk when I see one. Not to meantion whoever is tamperng with my e-mail-not suprising if it's my husband-soon to be ex-he's nuts too. Good timing for all this to happen on the first holiday I have to face....
I can't trust anyone anymore. All I ever was was loving and caring to xMM, and now everyone he is associated with thinks I'm a whore, and I am not! I just want to move on and e-mails from crazy people are not helping. Everytime I get an e-mail now, I just send a reply that I didn't send it and I apologize for any inconvenience (yeah, after they call me a whore!)
I'm going to cancel thay old e-mail account to avoid this in the future. Please help me get through this. Thanks for listening....

Pages
That's pretty horrible..
At least you know without a doubt what a mistake XMM was.
I can't believe people would actually bother to write to you to tell you your a whore.
That just shows how low class they are...somtimes the old adage applies.. If you don't have anything nice to say...don't say anything at all. I think it's funny when people judge others... who knows what kind of skeletons they are hiding. Everyone has skeletons.
This is out in the air for you now. No more hiding. No you can grive for trusing those you shouldn't and move on.
Positive Thoughts!!
Katja
Those people who sent you e-mails don't deserve any apoligies from you at all screw them. Change the account and don't respond or read their responses.
Good job about the NC you are doing good keep it up. If you fall back fine but come here don't let him know. Also block his number from him calling you.
Cali~
I am so sorry that you have to go through this crap...Get rid of the email account, this will stop people from having an opportunity to trash you. You don't know these people so in a way you should be saying to yourself "WHO CARES!"..screw these people..they don't know you. They DO know XMM, so now all HIS friends know that he was cheating on his wife. He's the one that should be ashamed, these are his friends and associates, not yours!
The whole thing is a nightmare but it won't last forever. You are going to hold your head high and ignore it. Try and be above it all. I know that sounds easier said then done....
HUGS
Jazzdiva
***************#1
Are you proud of yourself you psychotic little, bitch? How would you like for me to start calling the employees on Monday morning and give them my version of your happy little story. This is not the usual behavior of a sane HR employee. Yes, I also know all about you and two can play at this game.
So is this your game plan for winning John back, or have you given up and now just want to hurt him the way you felt he hurt you? It is very mature of you to involve his family and close friends in this. These actions will have him running back to you in no time! I think I will try to find out your Mom's email address so I can let her know what a dirty llittle whore you were for a year while you spread your legs for a married man with 2 children. I know that John is not innocent in all this, but this should have remained within the immediate parties involved. Don't you get that?
If you really think that the only reason John is staying with Lorry is because of his kids, you truly are insane. I have known them now for over 10 years and it is obvious to anyone around them how much John loves his wife. You took advantage of a rocky time in their relationship, but that is all it was. Their marriage was not, is not, and I am sure will never be over!!! I know this is a concept that someone like you can not fathom, but somewhere beneath that matted curly mess, I am hoping there is a brain! Don't you know that men can be dogs? That is all it was to him was an affair. Nothing you say will ever convince me that John was madly in love with you. John is not the type of person who is easily manipulated, if he really wanted to be with you he would be. His kids are not reason enough to stay in a loveless marriage. There is a little thing called joint custody if he really couldn't live without you - but he can and is.
I would think twice before continuing these escapades - they just might backfire on you.
Since I am sure you do not even know who you emailed - this is from John's sister-in-law!
PS - Have a lovely, lonely Thanksgiving!
***************#2
I think it's you that needs help...are you nuts doing this?? I dont care what happened...you just broadcast it to his friends?? Thats screwed up...and if you think that we will trust you over John...you're even more nuts...
Whatever happened with the two of you...it's obviously over...so do yourself a favor and move on...and grow up...this is completely childish behavior...
****My response to #1 and #2
First of all, I do not know who this is, and stop sending me these malicious, threatening e-mails or I will file a harassment suit against you. I have been subject to e-mail fraud, and I think I know by who. The original e-mail I sent was not intended for all to see. Someone took my original e-mail, obviously added things to it, and sent it to numerous people of whom I do not know. What kind of person do you think I am?
I originally sent this e-mail only to Dominique, a former co-worker of mine in HR, who had an affair with John for 1 and ½ years (his affair with her happened between 1999 and 2000).
So you see, even though you call me these names, and blame me for something, first know (1) I did not send you anything, someone else did under my account, (2) please know that John initiated the whole affair, I didn't pursue him and am not a whore or childish as you both claim, and (3) I am not his first (and probably not his last) affair, so obviously he is not as "in love" with his wife as you so eloquently describe. His previous affair with Dominique was probably not his first either, that's just what he and others have told me.
By the way, I wouldn't be up at this time in the morning if John had not called me at 3:30am this morning. So please tell your brother-in-law/friend to stop calling me as well. Why don't you all just leave me alone. I'm trying to move on with my life after being with that deviant predator, and harassing e-mails from crazy people like you don't help.
Don't send me anymore e-mails. Thank you in advance for your cooperation.
***************#3
{{By the way, I wouldn't be up at this time in the morning if John had not called me at 3:30am this morning}}
Well, considering I was on the phone with John at 3:30am...we'll just chalk this up to another one of your lies...when i got home from a gig last night and saw your email, i immediately called John...so i know you are lying on this....
Takes peoples advice...keep it between the two parties involved and grow up...honestly, if it's over, then move on...you had a husband, he has a wife...I've known John forever...and trust me...leaving Lorry was NEVER on his mind...not for you, or anything or anyone else...problems are problems...every couple goes through them...they have made it through them before and will this time...rest assured of that.
As for someone hacking you....Umm..yeah right....nice try....and if you want to go for harrassment, you'll need a LOT more then one email darlin'....how about a Defamation of Character suit that John can bring on you for sending that email last night?? be careful what can of worms you open...
Grow up, move on, get a life and disappear from John's. He doesnt want you anymore...deal with it...and start to deal with it like an adult. Not some love scorned little girl. You knew the deal going in...so you get what you get. It's not over, so just turn and walk in the other direction...you had a fling...thats all it was....Dont be pulling that fatal attraction crap...it'll get you nowhere but in trouble...
Now take note...this email is neither harrassing nor threatening...it's just some friendly advice from a 3rd party that YOU pulled into this situation...
Oh...and this is Taglieri. Unlike you, i've got nothing to hide...
****My response to #3
I have phone records to prove that he called, why don't you ask John if he called me.
Anyway (1) someone got into my Yahoo account, obviously it is not a secrue site and I will be closing it shortly and (2) you will not get anymore e-mails from this account.
After I said to stop e-mailing me, you continued to do so--that IS harassment. Please don't do it again.
I sincerely wish you the best of luck with your music career. I don't know what the hell people are saying about me, but I sincerely mean that. Take care.
This is great!!! NO better way to completely rebuild.. Sometimes I wish I could flat out HATE... XMM and his wife... BUT they are really lovely people... I hope they are happy.. XMM has never lied to me... He's never said the stuff I thought he should, but he never lied. XMM's wife sent me an e-mail about how special mom's are. YUCK could I hate myself more? YOU KNOW>>> YOUR XMM is a total ass and perhaps your soon to be ex as well... that makes it easy... I always get fired up when people put me down or try to pull the wool over my eyes... It lights a fire in my belly and I want to be even stronger and better then ever! I just want to show them that I don't care and they don't win. How would I do this? I say my peace, hold my head high and move on!
I hope your fuming mad! I hope you use that energy to rebuild something even better. Your bigger then this, your better then this! You can handle this, you really do know what to do!
Katja
Jazzdiva
Hang in there and let him and all of that go. NC and no responses to anyone.
Cali~
I am married too, and yes, I had an affair, and (drums.... tada) so did my husband. I do not view his OW as a whore, in fact I even sympathise with her. Having been on both sides, I understand now that we are all HUMANS. Yes, I blame myself and my husband, but I do not blame the OW at all. I can only do things that are in my control, which is to work on our marriage. I have no urge to throw insults at the OW or think badly of her - I have actually tried, but I couldn't.
All of us here have had the misfortune (or blessing, depending on how you look at it) to forge a meaningful relationship with someone who was never meant to be ours. Whether the partner in that relationship took it seriously or not, what's important is that WE took it seriously, and gave it our all and loved that person as sincerely as we knew how. Tell me - what is wrong with that? We can only learn from that and become better people.
Take heart. Here's a big virtual hug for you.
i really like your perspective on things. My priest friend told me that we should never regret having loved someone, whether that person was good enough for us or not. I'm not sure how I feel about that. My love for XOM was apparantly very different then his love for me, because he kept secrets from me for so long and hurt me very much. He says now that he prays for my forgiveness, but I have no room in my heart to forgive him. What he did to me was disgusting and wrong....much more wrong then me being an adulteress or having an A. I would never be able to lie like he did, or be manipulative like he was.
So yes, I regret it. The hurt that I felt from this relationship far outweighed the good. I take the blame on my end for participating in it, and I blame him and yes, i blame the other married woman he was doing because she apparantly was in on his game (even though in the end he was lying to her too).
It is just a big web of lies and deceit all around. A big mess. I am so happy to be out of it and now I can start to look at it from outside the box.
Jazzdiva
Pages