Knew it was coming . . . but still
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Knew it was coming . . . but still
| Tue, 05-03-2005 - 10:26am |
sad. Ended yesterday. Been friends for 4 years prior to getting "involved", but MM's wife got suspicious, confronted him this weekend and he decided to end it. Fair enough. I have to respect his wishes. We both knew it was wrong for us to be involved, but did it anyway. He's worried that I'm falling apart, I'm not. Sad, yes . . . disappointed, perhaps. But angry and upset? No. More sad that I know friendship aspect will most likely dissolve. I don't really feel like talking to him right now, but sometimes I wish I could talk to him.
Anyhoo, just looking for words of comfort . . .
K

You will find that the sense of sadness and dissappointment comes and goes. When I am bored or lonely it returns to me in waves. I have been doing my best to catch up on overdue projects, reaching out to long ignored friends and family and am working out at the gym frequently (exercise is an excellent lust reliever, by the way). I find that it is important to keep your "head" always talking to your "heart". Try and focus on all the rational reasons why it is better for you that it is ended- it's those nasty, selfish, narcistic feelings that will keep trying to suck you back into the "thoughless" void of the affair.
I am a MW currently in my 5th week of "withdrawal" from my 7 year A with a MM. What is your personal situation? Are you married or single?
Welcome to the Board and keep posting - you will find everyone here extremely supportive....
ARTIST
Hi Artist!
I am a MW of 5 years. The MM that the A was with was a co-worker/friend of 4 years, then we got together in Sept/Oct of 2005. Here's the messed up part-we're both Christians and knew it was wrong, but couldn't resist. Of course, guilt plagued me, but that subsided very quickly to my surprise. I think it plagued him more, especially when his wife confronted him. I can't say I feel any regret, again to my surprise. Just sadness . . mostly because the basis of our "relationship" wasn't sex. I don't want to interfere with his marriage, and don't think he wants to with mine.
So, trying to keep busy . . not think about it . . .
But, I am missing the attention-something that I don't get much of at home.
K
Yeah . . .I'm glad to know that others understand and can sympathize. It's nice to hear. I hope your days get better, I'm sure they will. I'm trying to stay busy, but at a new job (Thank God! Otherwise we'd see each other EVERYDAY), not real busy yet=time to stew.
Oh well, it's for the best. It SUCKS, but it's for the best.
K
hi kimtc1. As you well know there are many of us who know exactly what you are going thru. I too felt, that sad feeling. Not hurt as in "I can't live without him" but just plain ole' sad. My A ended 5 months ago and it has gotten easier with time. He moved to a different state (that's not what ended the A). The only thing I can tell you is work on your marriage. I am also so married. OM wasn't. But he knew I was. At times I still find myself thinking about all the fun we had, the memories I have with him. And I feel guilty for thinking about him. I try so hard not too. And think of what I have with dh. And how wonderful dh is. But I guess I'm only human and OM was someone I shared almost a yr with. DH doesn't know. So hang in there. Like I said there are many of us who know what you are feeling. Stay strong. Things can only get better if you want them too.
his4ever92