Letting go of the my addiction
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Letting go of the my addiction
| Thu, 10-08-2009 - 7:56pm |
I am having trouble getting over my ex. I was a late bloomer. I did not even have my first kiss until I was 18 yo and in college. I dated a couple of guys in my early undergraduate years and then

desperate2boverhim -
I can relate to your situation.
I found your story amazingly similar to mine. it's quite scary.
It has taken me a good year and a half to move on after the affair of a man i thought was the love of my life. His actions or inactions and clear lack of interest in me and my life shows me that there is NO WAY that he was the love of my life. You need to remind yourself of this EVERY SINGLE day. YOu need to understand that he was merely a fantasy or person that you share chemistry with and nothing more.
It has taken me a decade and a half to realize that if xAP and i actually got together we would have a lot of problems as well. NC is the only way to get you out of the pattern.
please let me know how you are doing. if i can do this ANYBODY CAN....honestly.
MW
I was the same, meaning contacting him when i felt anxious or down . but u know why they appear to be great listeners... because they don't have to do anything! it's easy to be all sweet and warm when he isn't the one to make the changes.
Just resist the urge to contact when u are down and the rest will follow. Trust me I had to retrain my brain after YEARS to realizing he is NOT my love and AP isn't yours either!!!
Hugs MW
MW -
You hit the nail on the head!!
TOTALLY!!! FOr me AP numbed the pain of a very unhealthy and painful marriage. but that's all he did numb the pain and gave me a false fantasy. i had to come to earth before i realized that AP was just a waste of time and didn't let me grow and figure out what to do with my marriage.
this is so hard. I still feel a little pain of xAP and i have realized that the history between xAP and i is such that i have to stay away to survive or i can easily be sucked in by this guy i have chemistry with.