Little announcement and then Roll Call time. ;-)

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2009
Little announcement and then Roll Call time. ;-)
48
Mon, 01-03-2011 - 10:52am

Hello enders and wanabe enders. :smileywink:

First off, I would greatly appreciate it, if there were no more responses to any of the "retreat" threads. Alwayst2 has graciously suggested to email/private message her for where to find further info on your retreat. Wishing you all good luck in pulling this off.

Be where you are; otherwise you will miss your life. ~ Buddha

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-10-2010
Mon, 01-03-2011 - 11:04am

I'm here, Iddy.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2010
Mon, 01-03-2011 - 12:26pm

I'm Bodhi (sanskrit for awakening or "to know")

My A lasted 7.5 years - we met through work. The company he works for is one of my clients. I'm left my M a year into the A, so I've been single for over 6 years now. I'm a SuperTweener! NC since June 27.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-03-2011
Mon, 01-03-2011 - 12:49pm
Hello EAS,

I'm a newbie ending my affair. We both are married and met through a message board. It lasted 18 months. I have been married for 10 years with the last few years being rocky (and definitely the past 18 months but no DDay thankfully.) I have been lurking for quite a while but was too afraid to post. My story is no different than most of yours. I can't believe I let myself go down that path and let the relationship control me...the lies that I told to my husband and Ex-AP. I am here to be held accountable as he has tried to end this affair multiple times but I never would let him go. It did not end well but I'm going to leave it alone and start out this year on a positive note. I thought my marriage was bad until I became involved with that man. Ugh.... I never thought I could feel worse. I'm not sure where to start....I have cried more tears over the last 18 months I cannot cry any more. Today is day 1. All pictures and emails deleted. Communication apps on phone deleted. I want to feel better and be able to look at myself in the mirror again. I want to be healthier....mind, body, and spirit. I'm emotionally exhausted :(. I want my husband and I to have a better relationship. We have put off counseling way too long.

Thanks for listening.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-03-2011
Mon, 01-03-2011 - 1:19pm
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2010
Mon, 01-03-2011 - 1:53pm

Welcome Looking up and Finding me!

Way to hit the ground running, both of you. Blocking, deleting - perfect start! I'm really impressed with filling up your own mailbox Finding me!

Can both of you start your own threads with your stories? I don't want want you to get lost in the roll call. :)

I'm so glad you're here.

Bodhi

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-13-2010
Mon, 01-03-2011 - 2:07pm

Today is 6 weeks NC for me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2010
Mon, 01-03-2011 - 2:21pm

A big WELCOME to lookingup and findingme. :smileyhappy:

I'm so glad for you both that you found the courage to end your affairs and to

Oct. 12, 2010 -- began my personal search and rescue mission.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2009
Mon, 01-03-2011 - 2:31pm

((Looking up))

Welcome to Endings. . I am so glad you came out of lurking. We don't bite, I promise, and if anything we may hug you too much and now is when you are going to need them the most. The first few weeks are tough, as I am sure you are already experiencing, but I promise you that it will get easier.

<>

Although I am not M, I have read this many times before. Thinking an A would be a solution to our problems ironically exacerbates them. Living a dual existence magnifies our emotional pain, worry, confusion, indecision, and sometimes can cause serious health issues. You were wise to get out now, no matter how it ended. Affairs are not the kind of love stories we read about in Harliquin Romance books or see in the movies. They very rarely end well due to the intense emotions that are never put to rest until someone finally puts a stop to the back and forth, push and pull emotive nature of them. They eventually become a catch 22, no matter how we hold it up to the light hoping there is some secret message encoded on it. The truth is, that piece of paper is just a blank sheet, watermarked by the many tears that have dripped on it.

Thank you for coming fwd. I would suggest copying and pasting your post into a new discussion if you would like more personal attention to your story. Someone, somewhere will completely relate to your words.

We are here for you, and be proud of yourself for taking this first step.

(((Hugs)))

Be where you are; otherwise you will miss your life. ~ Buddha
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2010
Mon, 01-03-2011 - 2:43pm

Welcome to our new members Looking Up and Finding Me..

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2009
Mon, 01-03-2011 - 2:54pm
FM,
I am so happy you took this opportunity to officially introduce yourself. You deserve the undivided attention just as much as anyone else on here. The fact that you have lurked for for a while tells me you are well versed in EAS lingo and protocol, so blocking and filling up your voice mail box (brilliant, BTW), were very necessary steps that needed to be taken. This *can* be the last time you end this if you stick to the determination that is helping you overcome this.

9 days of NC is HUGE, and I am very proud of you. It's the perfect way to start off the NY. Trust in the process, honey, because it works.

((Hugs))
Be where you are; otherwise you will miss your life. ~ Buddha

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