As long as we work together I can't do this!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-30-2005
As long as we work together I can't do this!
11
Tue, 11-16-2010 - 2:55pm

He is making this IMPOSSIBLE! I can't quit, in this economy I wont get the pay & benefits I do here, and as a single mom who's children have a worthless dad I can't do anything else. I was at my desk, he walked out with his dad to go to lunch, asked me if I wanted 2 tacos, I said no thanks. He said yes you do, tacos or burritos, I said no thank you. He said I'm buying you tacos, so I just said fine. I can't do this, I am not as strong as I want to be, I don't know how to make him stop without both of us losing our jobs.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2010

Fire him. :) and his dad! :)

when he brings the tacos back...throw them on the floor and scream and jump all over them and say ' I DONT WANT YOUR MEAT!!!!"

then go back to your desk, like nothing happened. :)

Listen, I dont know HOW IN THE WORLD you can work with him. Others will chime in with wisdom FAR BEYOND what I possess - I'll just say - I understand your desire to just RID yourself and have this be over ...and NOW!

I am WAYYYYYYYYYYYY too vocal & confrontational to be in that situation with any class - so that You actually showed up for work these past 2 days...you are A SAINT!

xo,

Michelle

Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart... Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens. I started looking inside and went NC October 15, 2010
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-30-2005
Lol, I totally would of thrown the tacos at him, but he had his dad bring them up. Came up to me and said, Oh these were S's treat today (exmm) . I am no saint. If I could call into work, I would!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2010

Smells like bullcrap to me, MO.

Yes, you can quit this destructive behavior if you want to. I realize I'm not in any position to give advice on how to manage when you work with xAP, but there are plenty of ladies here who do and have quite successfully quit their affairs.

You do not have to respond to him.

Oct. 12, 2010 -- began my personal search and rescue mission.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-30-2005
So I sent him a text, just said I can't be friends with you anymore. Please just pretend I don't exist unless it has to do with work. Thanks. (now I'll be on day one again tomorrow!) Great. He wrote back and said "this is so much bigger then a text, lets talk. When do you have time" So now I will just ignore and hope he will go away.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2010
Ask him if you can invite his wife along for the conversation.
Oct. 12, 2010 -- began my personal search and rescue mission.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2010

I CALL BULLCRAP!

read between the lines *this* <----his ego strokes, free sex, no investment, using you

Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart... Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens. I started looking inside and went NC October 15, 2010
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2010
No, I wasn't serious!! That will keep him playing with you. God, woman, it must be so difficult. I think you just have to cut him off entirely and DO NOT engage under any circumstances. If you haven't eaten them, throw the damn tacos in the garbage, preferably in a room where he might see them in there. He is def going to play games with you because he can't bear the thought that you don't want him any more. He will use every trick in his book. Charm you to the utmost...which is what attracted you to him in the first place, I bet. He's just waiting for you to cave because he only cares about himself. If he cared for you, he would respect you and your request.
Oct. 12, 2010 -- began my personal search and rescue mission.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2010

ps. Be very careful of your LANGUAGE - Self Talk ...etc. Your post says, "I cant do this!".....

What we put out into the universe - BECOMES our reality.

you CANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN & WILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL do this.

Tacos are the new Gateway drug!

Just say No!

:)

Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart... Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens. I started looking inside and went NC October 15, 2010
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2010

Whether you CAN or CAN'T, you're probably right.

Oct. 12, 2010 -- began my personal search and rescue mission.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2010

MO,

I, too, work with my xap. (I just joined this board.)

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