Everyone on this board who is struggling with the whole "closure" issue should be made to repeat this out loud 100 times!
"I'm also beginning to see that the questions I have for myself and the answers that go with them are harder to accept than any questions and answers I would ever get from my xAP. "
I hope you give yourself a big ol' hug and pat on the back for dropping this line; it a classic. 100%!!!
sweety - yes, what you are going through is huge so it is OK and normal for you to not have energy and to rethink and obsess. Think of it like this: All of us ending these affairs...it's sort of like going through a divorce. And let me tell you, people who divorce have a lot of emotions to deal with and need support and get support and have a road to travel for recovery. I should know..I'm going through a divorce now as well as the end of my A. My marriage was over a while ago but when we finally decided on separating, I prob spent weeks in my little room, in bed. I didn't want to do anything. Then I joined a support group and I've been pulling out of the depression and feeling better. Hang in there...you will get through this and you will be happy again.
I probably shouldn't even be here since I'm still in my A, but your reply to this post really hit home with me.
My therapist told me she couldn't help me, so I'm doing this on my own...as I have done everything since this bloody thing happened to me. I haven't left him yet, but it's getting ever closer because he's just not NICE. I have lost EVERYTHING because I fell in love with this man...yet, I just can't do anything right by him. I dress wrong, I talk wrong, I make sounds during sex. It's killing me and I don't know how to stop. I love him so much, I left my 25 year M because I fell in love with him. He's a jealous prick, with no right because I'M the one that's single...not him. Yet he tears me down, time after time if I don't tow the line and do what he wants/expects. I hate myself so much...I can't do this anymore. I'm sorry I was ever born, truth told.
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Everyone on this board who is struggling with the whole "closure" issue should be made to repeat this out loud 100 times!
"I'm also beginning to see that the questions I have for myself and the answers that go with them are harder to accept than any questions and answers I would ever get from my xAP. "
I hope you give yourself a big ol' hug and pat on the back for dropping this line; it a classic. 100%!!!
Thank you,
Dee
myShadow (cuz surely this isn't the real me)
I probably shouldn't even be here since I'm still in my A, but your reply to this post really hit home with me.
My therapist told me she couldn't help me, so I'm doing this on my own...as I have done everything since this bloody thing happened to me. I haven't left him yet, but it's getting ever closer because he's just not NICE. I have lost EVERYTHING because I fell in love with this man...yet, I just can't do anything right by him. I dress wrong, I talk wrong, I make sounds during sex. It's killing me and I don't know how to stop. I love him so much, I left my 25 year M because I fell in love with him. He's a jealous prick, with no right because I'M the one that's single...not him. Yet he tears me down, time after time if I don't tow the line and do what he wants/expects. I hate myself so much...I can't do this anymore. I'm sorry I was ever born, truth told.
Miserable? Yes
benska
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