My email address is mom_meandmyboys@hotmail.com. I would be glad to share with you what I have learned in T. I know my posts are filled with "my T said" but I have never felt so complete since entering T. I have learned to see the first signs of when I begin to shut ppl out and I have learned ways to stop being afraid of being hurt and communicate with my DH and others before I completely shut them out. There are signs and I have learned to pick up on them and stop. Part of the reason we do that is being we are passive/aggressive (google it and I will bet that you will find that the definition suits you as well). We use this as a coping mechanism. Usually we have experienced some kind of trauma. For me, I had a horrific childhood situation (abuse) which left me pretty skrewed up. It's hard to change your behavior but you can do it. I have learned to address situations and express myself when something bothers me immediately and not shut down. Please feel to email me. I actually sent my DH an email a couple of weeks ago telling him how much I love and appreciate him. This was really hard for me because I am embarrassed to admit that I hadn't even told my DH I love him in years. I noticed my DH had it in his wallet and one day he took it out, read it and smiled. He didn't even know I saw him but it felt really good to not be such a cold person as I use to be.
Thank you!!