My final letter and OM response

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-2004
My final letter and OM response
5
Mon, 12-13-2004 - 8:18am

HI, here is my letter which I finally sent to him.. short and sweet, Posies words, I could not have done better so I used them

from me to OM
~~I am unhappy with our relationship and have been for some time now. Your priorities lay with your family and friends. I am therefore making the firm decision to step out of the picture in order that you may honour those priorities freely and so that I may go on with my life.
I am asking you to respect my decision to end this relationship.
I wish you happiness in your life. ~~

And this is the response I got from him to it. What do you think?

From OM to me

~~Okie...if tat makes u happy...iv never held neone against their wishes...u know me better than that....friends is the onlee relationship tat lasts over a period of time...tc...
Love.. ~~

I cannot tell what he is thinking here.. I think the short and curt message threw him after the other long ones..the love that he put at the end.. well that he should not have put, he is trying to be the nice guy here. I have not replied to this at all, I know he expected a response from me, he usually does.

Tell me what you think pls ok? I am not sure how to react to this. I feel at peace except for the occasional spurts of tears, but crying does help sometimes.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2003
Mon, 12-13-2004 - 9:26am

Trish

What he is thinking is not your concern so forget it you have a husband who's your concern now so get focused and start applying yourself to your marriage 110 percent.

Time to ENFORCE TOTAL NO CONTACT, no monkeying around with it, it's over keep it that way.

I have to tell you by his letter he sounds like a total LOSER, what were you thinking.

BLOCK his e-mails and delete him from your address book, call the phone company and block his calls do what you have to do TODAY.

YOU ARE STRONG BELIEVE IT

Free

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-2004
Mon, 12-13-2004 - 9:49am

Free I was just waiting for the response from you on his reply mail, yes his reply makes no sense at all.. it is so weak just like him.. and yes what was I thinking.. :-( stupid woman me
But I wanted to share his response with you while I get ready for the next step - the NC.
Will keep you posted on my progress.. and yes I AM STRONG.. :-)
Hugs
Trish

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Mon, 12-13-2004 - 12:37pm
Let's forget about the fact that you are married for the moment (b/c that may be part of the problem) and look at what YOU want and need. Clearly, those wants and needs are not being met here or you would not be ending this, correct? Your message certainly sez that the rubber has hit the road and either this guy is too naive to realize it, or he just doesn't care. If I really cared about someone, my response would not resemble what was provided to you. It looks to me like it is something just to keep you hanging on for whatever reason and no one needs that.
Avatar for shescomeundone2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Mon, 12-13-2004 - 4:14pm
You really want my opinion? Well for one thing he sounds illiterate. I wouldn't read too much into the love at the end, but if it gives you comfort so be it. It doesn't matter what he said or what he is thinking what matters is YOU! Are you okay with this decision? I mean, really okay or did you do this to see his reaction? You said goodbye and he is respecting your decision, now go forth and prosper!

Jazzdiva

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-2004
Mon, 12-13-2004 - 8:45pm
HI Voyage and She
Yes it is what I want, the letter I sent was a final letter, one of a string of leters over 1.5 years, but this one HAS to be the last which is why i am here on these boards looking for the support see?
I am not looking to see what he thinks, as u asked she, and yes Voyage he has this care a hang attitude which is what made me leave him in the first place. I needed to feel loved otherwise, what is the point right? Why bend backwards for someone who is keeping me on a leash.. expecting me to sit when he says sit and play when he says play...
I mentioned before on these boards that he has this "narcisistic" character and he makes no bones about the fact that he is what he is. I forgave him many a time, because this is always the way he reacts to me when I say I want to break up. After which, he will sms or call or completely become the distraught lover who cant do without me. Its a cycle that has happend too many a time and this time I have decided to stop any forms of communication so that he does not do that again to me. I cannot take it anymore :-(
Thanks for your posting both of you..
Stay well
Trish