My little hula dancer is getting there!
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| Wed, 10-14-2009 - 5:08pm |
8 months today.
I am very proud of myself for not going back to the A; this is my longest stretch in almost 4 years. I feel so much stronger and grounded, more secure in myself. I love myself a whole lot more now! :)
Well-focused at work, and busy learning some new hobbies. My new place is almost finished, and I just love living here.
I'm still too fearful to start dating again. I was so deeply hurt from 3 years' worth of xMM's broken promises and drama, I just don't want that to happen to me again. My energies don't seem to be connecting with anyone else's so I guess I'm not ready. I am hoping I will feel ready soon; sometimes it's lonely. But for the most part I am quite content.
Shout out to the newbs and tweens. My heart goes out to you; hang in there. Trixie sez: the pain fades, yes it does... HAVE FAITH that you are doing the right thing - it will become obvious with time.
peace and hugs :)
trixie xo


Hi Trixie,
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It's so hard to imagine the above in the begriming isn't it? At least it was for me. When I see the newbies post and I know they are dizzy with the pain and turmoil. Eventhough I'm two years out of the PA, I still remember those days and weeks after ending that were almost unbearable. I remember them like yesterday.
I know some ask what they can do for the pain and I can only say that they have to go through it. Once you get to the other side you never want to go back again. If I could prescribe methadone or any such drug that curbs the withdraws, I wouldn't give it. Only in extreme cases.
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Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.
Way to go Trixie!
I am very very happy for you!!!!
You are living proof that "no pain"
Thanks ladies :)
You have both understood the point of my post exactly: NO PAIN - NO GAIN.
You cannot avoid it. None of us thought we would end up like this, right - you have to accept it and brace yourself.
You must live through it, cope with it, process it, pick it apart to try and understand it, learn from it to grow as a person.
Then - just let it go and move on, wiser, stronger, more confident, happier. The pain served its purpose.
hugs!
trixie xo
"Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it is about learning to dance in the rain.”
I noticed CL's are all gone! Maybe you can become one...lol.
Hey Trixie!!!!
Waving right back to you too;)