Need advice in a hurry please

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-08-2004
Need advice in a hurry please
6
Mon, 09-13-2004 - 4:56pm
I will re-cap real quick. I am MW ending A. triggered b/c every time we are together, he does a NC afterward for a while. This last time, he said it was because his GF was sick and that she had found some of my hair in his house & was asking questions & he was scared. Twice so far today, someone with a blocked i.d. has called my house and hangs up when I answer. As far as I know, he gets all his mail delivered to a p.o. box and deletes all calls from cell phone, so I just don't know. Do I e-mail him that it may be her? Do I have any obligatin to warn him or am I just looking for an excuse to contact him? Or, could it be her and she's waiting for a male voice to answer so she can talk to my H.? Am I just being totally paranoid here and they're just wrong numbers? I was thinking it could even be him, calling from a pay phone but why would he do that? Help, please!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-28-2004
Mon, 09-13-2004 - 5:05pm
TooSmart,

That's a lot of weird coincidences for one day for sure. I would probably steer clear of contacting him. (I'm with ya on the OM having NC after getting together...that sucks and that's what mine did) But trying to contact him will only weave an even more tangled web. What if she finds out, or has more ammo for your H if that's what she's up to? And, you are running the risk of starting up again with him. It may very well be wrong numbers, so try not to freak. I would try to answer the phone tonight, or better yet do that thing where can you block any blocked or private numbers. I know my phone co. does that, but not sure how. Stay calm, just be a little cautious. Keep us posted!!!!!!!
Love, Lily PG with #1 EDD 11/23 baby
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-26-2004
Mon, 09-13-2004 - 5:07pm
Don't jump to conclusions too fast. I have been guilty of hanging up when I have gotten the wrong number and not said a word to the person answering. Wait and see if it continues before panicking.

Think - could she know it was you? Could she get your number? Would she do that without confronting her boyfriend? Hangups do happen sometimes - it may not be what you think.

I have noticed that I have been more worried about stuff like that since I started my A. It goes with the territory. I hope it is nothing!

I have made a big deal over minor things when I have wanted to contact MM. I have worried about things that weren't that important and made mountains out of molehills so I had a good excuse to call him. I don't know you, so maybe you don't do that like me - but think about it, give it some time and set a goal before contacting him.

Wait for one more hang up - or wait for 4 more hours and then think about it again.

Good luck!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-08-2004
Mon, 09-13-2004 - 5:31pm
Good advice, I will wait and see if I get any more phone calls like that before doing anything. I left out 1 thing that may be relevant (or very well may not). The last I spoke to him, he was thinking about temporarily moving out of her apt. this weekend to clear his head. I don't know if he did or not and that triggered this. I suppose she could have gotten her hands on one of his phone bills, if he wasn't careful to lock it up or destroy it. I have a friend who snuck into her H.'s office at night and got the phone bills from his desk, copied all the recurring ones and then called them. I'll say one thing, this is a terrible way to live and yet another great reason to give this up.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-08-2004
Mon, 09-13-2004 - 6:10pm
I just got another one of these blocked id hang up calls. This is no co-incidence, I dont know what to do now.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2004
Mon, 09-13-2004 - 8:21pm
toosmart, first off, use "anonymous call rejection" to block those calls from coming anymore. In my area, you just press *77 to turn it on. It won't ring for you anymore and the caller will get a message saying you do not accept blocked calls. If they choose to unblock their number, at least you'll see who it is!
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-08-2004
Mon, 09-13-2004 - 9:08pm
Thank you Katie. I looked it up with my phone compnay and turned it on, so I feel better now.