Need Advice Today PLEASE!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-23-2010
Need Advice Today PLEASE!
14
Tue, 10-19-2010 - 12:56pm

Tomorrow is 8 weeks NC for me.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2010
Tue, 10-19-2010 - 1:18pm
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2009
Tue, 10-19-2010 - 1:25pm

Since he is coming to town on business then that is how you act. Business-like and professional. Skirt any Xmm inuendos. Change the subject or just nod that you heard him if he says anything about Xmm. Do not show any reaction to hearing Xmm's name if it comes up. If has sent a message through this guy just say, "Okay", "Good,"or "That's nice." Whatever one would best apply to whatever he says. One liners win every time. Heck, I have family that when I ask, "How are you?" I get "Okay." End of discussion. It shouldn't be any different with this dude. Again, keep it strictly business.

Hopefully the conversation won't even go there, so try not to get all worked up.

Be where you are; otherwise you will miss your life. ~ Buddha
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2010
Tue, 10-19-2010 - 1:31pm
Oh, totally Renewal. I simple shrug of the shoulders, and a polite smile is good enough. You are going to PERFORM your wellness and new sense of self/freedom. You are going to conduct yourself with dignity and do/say NOTHING to try and impress your xAP through his friend. You are away for business and keeping within professional boundaries should keep you from sharing ANY details about your current life. The other thought is, what if he doesn't pass a message along at all? I would hate to see you trying to make meaning out of that. Remember NONE of this matters anymore.

Whatever he has to say to you - remember it/he is LAME-O and he doesn't deserve any kinda reaction from you. Stay as far away from this colleague as possible. Remember sticking to NC means removing yourself from any and all situations in which you will be exposed to information about your xAP (where/when possible).

Please keep us posted.

TU.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-14-2010
Tue, 10-19-2010 - 1:32pm

good afternoon gal...

8 weeks tomorrow....THAT is fabulous!

Even if he does send a message is it going to make a difference?...will it make you feel better? Is a message from him worth taking a chance that

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-23-2010
Tue, 10-19-2010 - 2:06pm

I love you guys!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2009
Tue, 10-19-2010 - 2:33pm

Yep. Just think of all your EAS sisters standing right beside you giving this dude the stare down (with arms folded across our chests and our toes a'tapping. :smileywink:

You'll do just fine, and 8 weeks is HUGE. Kudos to you!

Be where you are; otherwise you will miss your life. ~ Buddha
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2010
Tue, 10-19-2010 - 2:58pm

Gal, 8 weeks is certainly a huge accomplishment to celebrate. Good for you!!

Oct. 12, 2010 -- began my personal search and rescue mission.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2010
Tue, 10-19-2010 - 2:59pm

Make it five ;) and all of us shall look like this:

----
'It may be that when we no longer know what to do,
We have come to our real work,
And that when we no longer know which way to go,
We have begun our real journey'
- Wendell Berry

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-20-2009
Tue, 10-19-2010 - 4:49pm

Ah, Grrrl.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2009
Wed, 10-20-2010 - 12:31am

gal,

8 weeks is an enormous accomplishment.

silence is eloquent, silence is dignified, silence is heard. ...

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