New Situation

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-14-2004
New Situation
12
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 2:15pm
Hey, for any of you that have not read my messages, I am new to the board and I really love the support. Thank you.

I have a situation that came up and I'm not sure how to deal with it. So I need your suggestions. Just to refresh, I have been having an A for 10 years, I have been trying to get out of it for at least half that time believe it or not, but you all know how hard it is. Last Friday everything was great I thought with the OM and then Saturday night he showed up with his XW at an outing we were both at. He of course totally ignored me. Anyway, I knew that he would either email and tell me not to hate him or totally avoid me, instead of being a real man and true friend and clue me in to what is going on. So I am sitting here today and he walks in my office, I thank God for giving me the idea to call my sister a few minutes earlier, so I was on the phone when he came in. He lingered a couple of minutes but I showed no sign of getting off. So he then looked at me and told me he would be back, I just looked at him. In about 10 minutes he came back, but my friend was already here waiting to go to lunch with me, so he left. Now I am confused because of course I am dying to know what he would have said, if he would have offered an explanation? Should I call and ask if he needs to talk or should I continue NC? My goal is to get over this A, I haven't wanted to be in it, I know you all understand. So any advice on what would be the best for me here would be appreciated.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2003
In reply to: gaillinette
Wed, 06-16-2004 - 10:56am
GL,

Aren't these men so full of themselves??? Like they are God's gift to us or something. :- ) What's up with the hitting buisness?? We all like that programmed cat in pavlov's experiment sure enough respond to that.. lol We should know better. There is a reason why we got out this A, right?? But don't worry about slipping up, it happens all the time. Hey, it even happens in non affair relaionships - like a best friend of mine here at work! LOL So just keeping trying for NC and one day if you want it well enough you are going to get there.

Juliet


Edited 6/16/2004 10:57 am ET ET by julietsfate

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-14-2004
In reply to: gaillinette
Wed, 06-16-2004 - 11:06am
Thank you for saying that, that's what I can't figure out, it's like wait a minute, you are the one who is lucky that I ever gave you the time of day. To be honest it gave me pleasure to know that he wasn't going to be faithful to the XW again if they do get back, but I'm working on that feeling, it's a selfish, hateful feeling.

I did get the chance yesterday to say a few things I wanted to say, I let him know that I loved my husband and that I was very disappointed in him (OM) so I feel a little better, I didn't fall for anything he offered.

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