This is not an extension of MAS!
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This is not an extension of MAS!
| Sat, 01-29-2011 - 12:03am |
I am not the best writer on here, but I have been on this board a long time and I have seen people come and go and am struggling as I have read posts today.

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WAIT!!!
This is not the xAP Psychic Hot Line? And I came prepared today sporting my Miss Cleo head scarf!!!
E1
Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.
My 2 cents.
Here's WHY the board WORKS:
ENDING = ABSOLUTE
No grey areas.
I GUARANTEE, that when I stumbled upon the board...in MY "condition" (in "love"...foggy...desperate...wishing against all hope he was really leaving his wife like he'd promised....) had I been given the option to treat the "ENDING" board like a wishy washy playground to "FEEL GOOD" while waiting for him to finally leave...I'd still be sitting on my sorry A$$ feeling sorry for myself...these 3 mos later...NOT HAVING GOTTEN ANY BETTER.
Mom G,
You are a VIP (Very Important Poster)!
Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.
OH WOW... Pot, meet kettle... I routinely lurk here to help people over on MAS who may be better served by you strong ladies. I also tell them to be FULLY prepared to END if they choose to post here.
BUT, I gotta give Scarlett some props for her original post in this thread. Luvin...you KNOW you have come over to MAS and posted trying to get some of us to "see the error of our ways"...so you starting this thread is a HUGE slap in the face and Scarlett was right to call some of you out...and you KNOW who you are ...who routinely come over to MAS and admonish us in a "holier than thou" fashion... I won't name names.
I guess this is what I struggle with - and let's just use the addiction framework as it has been so well established that having an affair is indeed an addiction, complete with denial, blame, justification, rationalizations, lying, cheating, deceptive behavior.
If I run a support group for those actively using ... teaching them how to safely use needles, dress their wounds, save their teeth, get some sort of nutrients, come in the from the cold, find resources, keep their jobs etc ... and once in a while someone drops in who can say,
"You know what, I was where you were, I was throwing it all away for the next fix, I felt as helpless as you do to end it. I didn't think life was possible after addiction ... heck, I didn't want to EVEN IMAGINE life without this drug. But you know what, it is possible. There are resources available. There are places where you can go, be welcomed. YOU CAN stop this pain. I BELIEVE in you. The work will be hard - LIKE HARD HARD HARD. But it will be worth it - YOU are worth it. I mean really, take a look around. Is this where you wanna be in 1 month, 1 year - longer? Who else do you want to lose? Which kids have stopped talking to you? Have you lost your job yet? Your friends? You feelings of self-worth? Look at ME ... I was where you are RIGHT NOW and I didn't stop using in time. I lost my husband and have hurt my children beyond belief. I had to leave a job and lost friends. PLEASE know that I don't judge you, heck I have been where you are SO I KNOW THAT YOU TOO CAN DO IT. AND sometimes you just can't wait to be READY ... other people's lives depend on you NOW because sure as heck if they will be "READY" to deal with the pain that follows if this addiction continues and you are discovered"
That for me makes sense. It doesn't seem to make sense that someone actively using would go into a group where people have committed to ending their addiction and say "HEY what you're doing won't work for me ... and so until you fix your approach (even if it works for all the others), I am just going to stay using."
Now, who has what to offer?
We have been inside an affair, we have made it here.
NOT because we are better ... or holy. BUT because we had some glimmer of hope, someone who was real with us maybe for the first time in a long while, and maybe finally we trusted that life could indeed be better. And we took a leap here.
TU.
TU...you totally missed my point. I don't necessarily disagree with you or the EAS "message". Although I do disagree that **ALL** A's are an addiction...if I remember correctly,
. . . . and as I was walking back to my yard, I thought: You know what, anyone can start a thread about whatever they want...so, whatever :)
I have been here since November 2010 and have never felt berated.
I have a lot of respect for those who had BTDT, that set time aside for me, to reach me, share their painful experiences, and tell me exactly how it is, for no other purpose but to save me. The tough love awakened me and was constructive, and it hurt sometimes but i sure as hell needed it.
I don't know if any of you are familiar with the show 'Intervention', but it's the tough love that gets through to the drug addicts.
EAS brothers and sisters keep doing what you have been doing, you are amazing!!!
V888
xxxx
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