oh oh, now what!!!
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| Thu, 04-14-2005 - 2:18pm |
What a weird week. I finally decide to write my (x) friend an apology letter and then out of the blue, this happens.
My best friend (who is also my boss) never knew anything about my A. I kept her in the dark about the whole thing, mainly because she was semi-friends with XMM's W also. I wanted to tell her, and planned on it eventually, just never did yet. Well yesterday morning his W calls her while we were at work. She's edgy and irritated, and asked my (Boss) to meet her for lunch next week. Well needless to say, my boss/best friend is wondering what she's up to and asks me if I know anything about it. Well obvioulsy I had to tell her. I couldn't let her find out through them having lunch. Now my boss/friend is totally Peeved at me (which I expected.) I tried to talk to her about it but she won't discuss it with me. She ended up leaving work for the day. I don't know what to do. I think she is mainly upset that I never told her and she had to find out like that. I 'm glad I don't work today and she doesn't work tomorrow, cuz there'd be a lot of tension there.
To top it all off, XMM showed up today to tell me about the "episode." I told him that when my boss/friend finally comes around to me, I'm not lying to her. I'm not protecting him. If he gets in trouble it's too bad. I've had enough, I've dealt with my demons over the whole thing and I want nothing more to do with him. He did say that my boss/friend called his W after she left work yesterday. I know she must think it's all my doing!
So my question is, should I call my boss/friend and try to get her to talk to me? or do I just let it go and make work uncomfortable for everyone. I know she will come around. She's my best friend and I understand her being mad. But if she's gonna ignore me for now, I'd rather not even go into work.
I guess now would not be a good time to send the letter. This is all so weird after months of nothing going on. I feel like I could vomit. Lesson learned!

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Why is XMM still coming around, or even allowed to? This tells me that his wife contacted your boss out of sheer desperation in wanting to *know* if there has been any contact between you and her husband. Apparently you still see him, so she has *good* reasons for doubting the crap that he most likely is still feeding her. SHE wants to know if XMM contacts you at work and that is the reason for the lunch date. The wife is hoping to get information, and is counting on her semi-friend to back her up. This is my guess, and just speculation, but the wife *also* needs to understand that putting your job in any kind of jeopardy could be considered harrassment.
Stay out of it. Stay away from XMM. Do not send that letter....especially now. It will look intentional in light of these new developments. She could turn that around as harassment from you.
Let your boss meet her for lunch without anymore interference from you. Lay as low as you can. After their lunch, it will be up to your boss if she shares their conversation with you. You have just unloaded some stuff on her that puts her in a very uncomfortable position. You have got to *STOP* pushing the envelope.
Id
Id,
XMM hasn't been coming around for quite some time. This is a first and he claims it was to tell me about what happened. (we've had contact, but not much, and he hasn't been stopping by like he used to.)His W knew that my boss didn't know about the situation. She told XMM that she wanted to let her know what kind of person she is friends with. So I don't agree that she was fishing for info from her. I think she just wants her to hate me so I'll hurt. (which is understandable.)
What kind of upsets me is that my boss is MY best friend. She is only friends with the W because she worked for us for a while. They really didn't even get along that well. But she chooses to go home and call for HER side of the story and won't even discuss the situation with me. Unfortunately, her side of the story isn't the true side. It's the side that her H "wants" her to believe is true!
I know it puts her in an awkward position. But I know her, and I also know she would have been there for me through this had I told her about it up front. I know she's stewing right now, and I also know she'll come around. It's kind of hard to let it go at work. There are 9 of us who work VERY closely and there is no way to avoid it. It will be uncomfortable for everyone if the 2 of us aren't speaking. Which is why I wonder if I should just call her and get it over with. I don't have to work with her again until Saturday. Maybe I'll hold off. I know I've created a mess, but I thought it was pretty much behind me now. UGG!!
Pal
Affairs the gift that keeps giveing...heartache that is.
I have to agree with the others go to work do your job and give you friend time to get used to all this, I suspect in time she will reem you out then after that you will really talk about it.
GOOD LUCK
Free