Ok Help Me .... 5 minutes no contact

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2010
Ok Help Me .... 5 minutes no contact
16
Fri, 11-12-2010 - 3:37pm

Ok.... I did it....now what??? help me please

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2010
Fri, 11-12-2010 - 4:41pm
DITTO! Ill be here too - If you need Anything! :)
Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart... Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens. I started looking inside and went NC October 15, 2010
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2010
Fri, 11-12-2010 - 4:56pm
Me too - I'll be here ...

CLOUD - you've made my day in coming back.

What I found helpful was to literally walk around my house and hold objects (pictures, my kids toys) that would ground me back into my REAL LIFE. Not an imaginary world that I had built up in my mind (or online), but the real life that was surrounding me.

I don't know it you have a family - children of your own, a partner? Maybe I've missed this. Our fantasy relationships impact on these real relationships. We only think we have developed feelings, but after a while you'll realize that what you're calling love (what many of us called love) wasn't love at all. How can you even know a person who you've only seen a few times a year? You fell for an image, a perception of him that was created online. You didn't experience any stresses of real life with him. See, you may have dealt with hardships created within the "reality" of the affair, but you've never had to cope with anything as mundane as grocery shopping or as significant as financial crisis. It was a staged relationship. It was devoid of the troubles of real life.

It is a lot to take in, but the sooner you can come to grips with this, the sooner you'll stop missing an illusion and focus on the real.

((hugs))

TU.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2010
Fri, 11-12-2010 - 5:19pm

OMG

Cloud, I am so proud of you!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-30-2010
Fri, 11-12-2010 - 7:06pm
Cloud...I'm so glad you came back here. I'm fairly new here so I don't quite know all the history, but it seems you've struggled with this decision for a while. Don't doubt your decision now - ending it was and is the right thing to do. I will be around also if you need support. Take some time for YOU this weekend. Allow yourself to feel whatever it is you are feeling. Go to the gym and work out your aggressions. Can you talk to a friend you trust? Post and read on here and listen to the advice these wonderful ladies are offering. Hugs to you darlin!

Dee...hahahahaha bubbledialed!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2010
Fri, 11-12-2010 - 7:57pm

Cloud -

<<>>

The simplicity of your post touched my heart. As you've already seen, you will get a lot of support here. I'm also single, and able to check EAS often over the weekend, so post when you need to.

"Remember that sometimes not getting what you want is a wonderful stroke of luck."

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2004
Fri, 11-12-2010 - 10:10pm
Hi Cloud,

Big hugs to you, I am so happy you decided to stay with your decision on ending your A :) Post and read as much as you can,also take extra care of yourself and be kind to yourself :)

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