A is over

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-25-2010
A is over
10
Thu, 07-29-2010 - 12:10am

The A is over…… in the right section now!!


New Choices, New Chapter,


New Challenges,

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-17-2010
Thu, 07-29-2010 - 2:36am

NC,


I'm sorry if i had a hard time getting

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-25-2010
Thu, 07-29-2010 - 5:00am

Hi Liberty,


I hope i can make things clearer for you.....


XAP's W asked that he go total

New Choices, New Chapter,


New Challenges,

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-01-2010
Thu, 07-29-2010 - 5:11am

NC... omg... you're story is so like mine. And as for the past day obsessive wouldn't be in it.


I am at my lowest point and miss XAP desperately... he set up a social network after being against it and after me ceasing all contact, changing no etc, and i've messed up by looking at his page.... fool me. It is killing me.


So the six month thing, do you not think it will keep you from progressing? how are you gettin on with you H? I'm planning a date this weekend and I cannot summon the 'fake it til you make it' mantra.


How long have you been NC??? Oh god, I wish I could see XAP, I need to get this fantasy outta my head, Bodhi's post about reality and fantasy is so accurate.


I hope we can both work things out for the best.


PL x :(

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-25-2010
Thu, 07-29-2010 - 5:35am

Hi PL


It takes a lot of self control and discipline to maintain NC... i think i gain strength from knowing that xAP wont contact me and if he does, it will actually prove to me he is not as 'moralistic and virtuous' as i thought he was in my full A fog......'and i am damned if i will contact him first!


Yes, setting a 6mo

New Choices, New Chapter,


New Challenges,

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-01-2010
Thu, 07-29-2010 - 5:57am

Your story is so like mine... I find it so difficult right now to stop myself from looking on facebook or contacting XAP... saying especially as he was the last to contact (3times)... and wants to respect my decision. But god I miss him. I have to get outta the house today.


Re your mismatched libidos, do you seek to work that out? I'm the same, I force myself because I need to and can't do that.


But credit to you, you've been married

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-25-2010
Thu, 07-29-2010 - 6:59am

Hi PL


No H and i wont be working on libidos, gone on long enough, think we both know whats what there, now and again i fire up, but mostly. 'go thru the motions'....My H always said....keep

New Choices, New Chapter,


New Challenges,

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-01-2010
Thu, 07-29-2010 - 7:20am

you seem really wise about your A and XAP... in fact, wise all round.


I have married a man who adores me, yes at the time, I thought, I can't get any better, and today I'm thinking, he loves me more than I think I could ever love him.


My head is a mess about marriage, sometimes I think, now is not the time to work out if this is what I want because I am too consumed by XAP.


After I get over him, I will work it out, and I hope, realise.. H was the one for me.


Thanks for your advice... this board works to help us all, but some days, I just cannot function.


Take care.


PL

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-10-2010
Thu, 07-29-2010 - 9:17pm
I hope Empowerment1 responds to this post. E1 are you out there?

~~Serenity~~


Better than a thousand hollow words is one word that brings peace. ---Buddha

~~Serenity~~


Better than a thousand hollow words is one word that brings peace. ---Buddha

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-17-2010
Thu, 07-29-2010 - 10:52pm

Hi NC,


Your xap is like mine's.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2010
Thu, 07-29-2010 - 11:25pm

Will repost later...

Edited 7/29/2010 11:45 pm ET by luvinmeforever10




Edited 7/29/2010 11:46 pm ET by luvinmeforever10
Luvin
Yo Soy EL Capitan de Mi Vida