Pink Floyd
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| Fri, 03-26-2004 - 8:00am |
The Pink Floyd song that reminds me of my marriage is "Comfortably Numb." I heard this song, for the first time in years and years, while driving on a country road about 3 years ago. The lyrics rang out to me--"I have become, comfortably numb." This was well before my A, but long after i had (after 17 years of my relationship with my H) that indeed, i was just going through the motions of my life--in a constant state of numbness. The lack of emotional connectedness (and all other unconnectedness) i had with my H had forced me to modulate down to his non emotional level, so that I could at least co-exist with him. Wow. What insight i had that day when i heard that song.
The last Pink Floyd song that has to do with my situation is "Breathe" (Breathe, breathe in the air/don't be afraid to care/leave/don't leave me). My XMM emailed me the words to this song one day last spring/summer when he was feeling especially torn about our relalations (when i had tried to cut it off from him, telling him we could only be friends). It summed up both of our feelings: leave, (but) don't leave me. . .
Pink Floyd has been important in this story to me. . .
Clarice

There is a song they haven't released yet called "I Can I Will I Do". I posted the lyrics in full down in the misc. part of this board, but this little section here is something I think we can all relate to, either from our own point of view or that of our XOM:
I imagine you think I don't think of you
You know you couldn't be more wrong
If good intentions paved the road that gets me through
Then I've got a six-lane highway
And I intend to someday
Do all the things I say I can and I will and I do
Hey - it's hard for me to go away
Okay, I know it's not adult
But it's just as difficult for me to stay
And anyway you say
You don't think I can love you
You don't think I can love you
You don't think I can love you love you love you
But I can and I will and I do. I can and I will and I do.
i am having an amazingly hard time concentrating and working today. don't know why. maybe it's because he's in Miami now and i am hoping my trip there last weekend, cast a long and beautiful shadow for him to see. Yesterday, i was thinking about throwing him a surprise birtthday party with his best friend (i got past that and won't!). just now, i made him a cd of some songs i've been listening to. i thought i give it to him for his birthday (I once gave his son a cd for his birthday of all my kids favorite rock/altenative songs--and my XMM and his boys loved it). You'll be happy to know, i made the CD and put it in my car. I will never give it to him.
I am supposed to be working right now but am having a hard time focusing on that too. I know it's because he's in Miami. We once talked about how we seem to be connected through our feelings, thoughts and emotion: meaning i feel what he feels; and he feels what i feel. we called this the ET/Elliot thing (from the movie ET--i of course, got to be Elliott (because i am cuter!); and he was ET. So i bring that up, because once again, i wonder if he is thinking of me.
You see, this is how it works. One day you are doing fine; the next you are fantasizing and daydreaming and all of that. . . . it just keeps going and going. but as least i know i am getting better.
Clarice
Break Your Heart
Lovers In a Dangerous Time
Take It Outside
Some Fantastic
The Wrong Man Was Convicted (great lyrics)
Of course I would recommend ALL the bnl songs, but those are ones that I think you might especially appreciate right now. Let me know if you like any of them! :)
Edited to add 3 more must-haves:
Call and Answer
Thanks, That Was Fun
Powder Blue
Edited 3/27/2004 1:28 pm ET ET by maybekatie