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| Fri, 10-22-2004 - 1:18pm |
This is just a general question about my ex-OM. He has been burned in two bad marriages. Both of his wives left him and took the stepchildren that he raised. He took both of these divorces very hard. He does not like to be alone. He has always told me that he would always have a girlfriend. He always dates one woman at a time. I know that he is scared of marriage again and I understand that. He is blowing his money left and right to keep his current girlfriend around. She has 4 kids and has her own house. Her car is broken down, so she drives OM car. He is neglecting his own bills to give her money to spend on herself and her kids. He had to file bankruptcy to save his house and his car. He has told several of his friends that he doesn't want to marry her. My question is this. If he doesn't want to marry her, then why is he going into so much debt to keep her around? He could always go out and find him another girlfriend. Is he that afraid of being alone or does he just not want to have to hunt for another girlfriend? I don't get it. He is letting this one ruin his finances. I know that he is scared of marriage, but gee, this is ridiculous.
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| Fri, 10-22-2004 - 1:49pm |
Hi Southerngirl! I hope this doesn't sound harsh, but I wonder why you care, and why you just aren't grateful to be away from him. And I mean that. It sounds like he has some real insecurity issues, maybe even codependency. He needs some individual therapy. He'll never live in peace (or financial solvency, for that matter!) until he gets these issues under control. JMHO. Keep your chin up, you're much better off without him! Love, Mo.
| Fri, 10-22-2004 - 2:10pm |
Southern girl, just an observation: You seem to expend an *awful* lot of energy trying to figure out what is going on in that guy's head!!!! But the reality is, as much as you try to analyze him, you will never know anything for sure unless you hear it straight from him. It is a waste of your time and energy to sit here and wonder ceaselessly about what he is thinking and why he does the things he does. You'd be much better off focusing that energy inward!

