Please Help ASAP
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Please Help ASAP
| Tue, 10-26-2004 - 8:48pm |
Hi Ladies. I need your help like never before. Today my MM & I broke up for good. Apparently I pushed him too far, and I know that that was my intent. Unfortunately, I did not fully gauge the ramifications. He blocked me from all future emails. I have had too much to drink right now and I am all alone. My H hates me b/c I was smoking when he left to go out with his friends. I am devastated. I knew it had to end w/MM and I started the discussion to end it. However, I never anticipated how far he'd take it. He will never speak to me again, ever. I also have to tell you guys something. When I got into my accident this summer, after I had done it w/MM, I had a miscarriage. It is the single most painful thing that has happpened to me. I did not want to have his child or anything like that. But to go thru it alone is devastating. I need some comforting words right now b/c I am all alone and you guys are my only help.

Sorry blue but your stuck with me.
Your HUSBAND the only man in your life that matters is acting the way he is because of how badly he has been hurt, he would not be hurting or making such a big deal of the smoking if he did not love you as much as he does.
Does your husband know you were pregs with the XMM baby ??
I would like to believe that that worthless jerk will really leave you alone but thats not likely sooner or later his ego is going to demand that he reconquer you, maybe by then you will have cleared your head enough to not let that happen.
In the mean while make the most of TOTAL NO CONTACT to get yourself together, ending it means getting that turd out of your life totally regardless of what it takes.
Him being completly gone is NO lose at all, in fact it is the only hope of saving your marriage.
Blue don't be sorry that you pushed XMM push over the edge it is really the best thing you could have done and maybe the first step in getting the real you back again, because I don't think the you we have seen up to now is the real person that your husband married.
Free
As bad as you feel right now you are going to make it through the night, first step no more drinking, not just tonight but for the forseable future you need to dry out.
You will cry and for now thats ok you need to vent the pain some how and crying is one of natures/Gods (pick which one you like) of releasing the internal pressure and balancing the bio - chemicals.
You need to understand as bad as this is your going to get over it all, WE ALL DID.
Free
Perhaps subconsciously you WANTED to push MM away. You know what you're doing is wrong.
You have no future with that man so its best to cut bait and move on NOW. Start your healing immediately. NC is the only way to feel better, if you keep talking to him off and on that will just delay the inevitable and make you feel worse, not better.
Take care.