please help me ...
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please help me ...
| Fri, 06-25-2010 - 1:41pm |
take the last step.
as you know I have been in LC due to work - well today I resigned from our mutual contracts after getting another email that hurt embedded within a work related correspondence.
So now I have blocked him from everywhere - but I need you to push me to delete our shared email accounts. Yes they are still active. I know that this is needed - but I remain reluctant. Why? Because it really is that last thread between us - where eventually I know he will write ... and I want to do this so bad - so please tell me what I already know to be true - screw what he thinks, erase those accounts.
Thanks.
TU.
LC/NC since April 14, 2010
"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it."
— Maya Angelou

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Good for you TU for doing what is best for you to move forward with your life. You also mentioned a while back that he was not pulling his weight on the project and you were doing his work too. It really was not fair to you all the way around. I’m glad to read you are stepping away from working with him.
I talked to my hubby who is a ninja computer guru and he said if it is set up the way he is thinking then it probably would not do any good to delete the emails as he has probably gotten a copy of them if he has the master account those emails are connected to or he would probably have a way to recover the emails even if you deleted them.
So the Serenity Prayer for you dearest TU:
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
You’ve changed the most important thing you can which is not working with him. The rest you may just have to let go of.
Much love and big hugs,
E1
Whether you think you can or you think you can’t you are probably right.
Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.
tu - I have to say his actions are pretty low. Good grief, how immature ya know!
I'm torn on deleting everything now or saving it. Do you think you might need the emails for some evidence in the future? If not, then delete those suckers if you can and call yourself free and lucky.
Could you forward the emails to another acct. for safekeeping if you think you might need them, then delete the shared acct?
Another big part of me says delete it all and go on with your life. He is trying to keep his foot in the door and playing games with you.
Thank you to all who posted with words of advice and support.
I am totally exhausted.
E1 you are right. There is no way he would have 'allowed' me access to the account again unless he had it all backed up. I feel like he is playing a game of chicken with me. Sad doesn't even begin to describe how I'm feeling. I can't believe it has come to this - after all ... *shoulder shrug*: why did i think it would be different for me? Because he said over and over how much he loved me, how he would never live without me, how time was all we needed, because he told his W ... blah blah blah. I thought he would keep his Sh$T together so that I could remain as a colleague. Nope.
And now, here I find myself: separated from my H and leaving projects that I worked my butt off on - that I loved, never mind the money I lose. Kids have already been pulled outta things to try and salvage our finances since the separation.
I am going to see his name in print on my work. My career path is forever altered because of this. Ya- I know, shoulda thought of all of this before. Well, last lesson learned Universe. He and I can not (even/ever) be colleagues.
TU.
LC/NC since April 14, 2010
"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it."
— Maya Angelou
"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it."
— Maya Angelou
Hugs to you TU.
My heart goes out to you.
My career path is forever altered too. I changed careers completely- but it was the best thing for me. So he gets to go on being a rock star in my old profession. So effing what? I have my own life to pursue and I will be a rock star in it... and you will too.
Hugs,
NC/LC since January 28, 2010
http://secretlifeofjane.wordpress.com/
NC/LC since January 28, 2010
http://secretlifeofjane.wordpress.com/
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