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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-17-2011
Post Removed
3
Thu, 04-26-2012 - 9:17pm

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2011
Thu, 04-26-2012 - 10:29pm
Honey, I think this is *very* normal at this point. 5 months not very long to get over a 10 year A. Add in a long drive in the dark and I'd say it would be surprising.that you weren't "down" sometimes.
I'd try reframing by.looking at how far you *have*.come versus how far (you.think) you haven't come.

You are.doing great sweetheart.
Community Leader
Registered: 06-08-2010
Thu, 04-26-2012 - 10:38pm
Ethereal,
Sweetie, you were in the A-hole for quite a long time. Over 10 years. And 5 months NC is nothing to sneeze at. You are on this journey out. Because you were in the unhealthy habit zone for so long, it is no surprise really that your cravings are still very strong. The fact that you are recognizing this is the important part. You even take note of your trigger times and the music...both of those observations are critical in your healing. 5 months of no looking back after that door was slammed like a manhole cover over the A-hole for you...wow. That, my dear, takes courage and strength. Even if you can't feel it, especially that you have those cravings more frequently. You mentioned the feelings of being wounded and vulnerable. These are very intense feelings and I am just hoping and saying an extra prayer that you take extremely good care of you. 5 months out after 10 years in is a good chunk of time, but not nearly enough to discover why you stayed for so long and what is missing inside that created that void in the first place. You need to find healthy escapes, make new habits and maybe listen to Adele when it is sunny outside? :)
Posting here was the PERFECT thing for you to do, sweetie. ((((HUGS)))) and much, much encouragement being sent your way.

Hearts <3
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-17-2011
Thu, 04-26-2012 - 10:54pm

Thanks, ladies.