In a quandry and need my fellow EASers advice and HELP!!

Community Leader
Registered: 06-08-2010
In a quandry and need my fellow EASers advice and HELP!!
18
Mon, 10-25-2010 - 11:46pm

Hello all,

Well, I made it thru Monday and did not have to run into xAP.

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Avatar for mhash
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003

I can understand avoiding situations where you can be tempted. I would have a problem feeling restricted because my partner does not like to do things that I would want to do. My partner is an introvert (so am I but not as much so) and I like socializing.

I do not want to hijack this thread so this topic of doing things without your partner can be discussed on another thread.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2010

Mhash -

No need to hijack :) I've been divorced from him for 6 years now - that wasn't the only problem we had. I'm 4 months out of a long A, and slowly getting myself prepared to dip my toe back into the dating pool. Thanks for your response! :)

Bodhi

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2010

Sorry, didn't see your BTW - I don't label myself as any one religion, but yes, I do follow the teachings and ideas of Buddhism. I loved the name Bodhi for my screen name at EAS because I was searching for enlightenment.

Bodhi

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-20-2009

Happy Birthday, Heart-

I'm glad to see that you came to the right conclusions with the help of the people who posted support.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2009
I'm glad you thought this through with the help of your fellow enders. It was smart of you to bring it here. Sometimes we can't see the forest for the tress, KWIM? I also agree with Dee that you need to stand up for yourself if this ever happens again. For the most part people have good intentions, but there is always an element of "What's in it for them" hidden just beneath the surface. By the time you finish your EAS journey, you will be able to smell out manipulation like a Blood Hound. ;-)

((Hugs))
Be where you are; otherwise you will miss your life. ~ Buddha
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2010
Heart! A happy birthday (to come) for you!!! I just finished reading this whole thread and was delighted that by the end of it, you were able to see that putting you and your feelings first is what counts! It reminds me of wcf's post where she challenged us to think about how NC allows us to learn lessons about ourselves that extend WAY beyond just ending an affair. The process of ending is way more about re-thinking how we get our needs met in healthy, life affirming ways. It is about not compromising our own integrity and dignity to save other people from feeling badly. It is about asking for what we need and not settling. It is about never ever apologizing for having needs and expectations to have them met ... without begging & pleading! You will be celebrating your 40th on your own terms!!! What a way to mark such an important milestone! I wish I could be there for your chicks only night.

Much Love,

TU.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2010

oh MY!!!!!! ((((((HEARTS)))))))

3 AND 6 !!!!!!

I am soooooo HAPPY THAT YOU'RE THINKING OF YOURSELF IN A GREAT WAY!!!!!!!!

That is SOOOO AWESOME!!!!

You're AMAZING!!!!

Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart... Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens. I started looking inside and went NC October 15, 2010
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2005

Happy upcoming 40th!

I'd come up with any good excuse why it is impossible for you to attend.


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