It's not that I'm afraid of letting go... I just don't want to miss the good time (there were some in far between! lol). My therapist said that even abusive relationships you have to mourn. There is a process you go through after each relationship where you take time to heal. I just don't want to mourn and miss the old memories. It's like someone you had in your life for so long and to think you'll never see them again... but that's what time is for, it heals all wounds.
"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together."
In my case, and through DEEP soul-searching...xAP represents and filled a void I was lacking in myself...one that cannot be filled by any other human being excpet ME :) To let go of him leaves me again with that PAINFUL gaping hole and the HARD work of filling it myself :) I'm working on it, and it will take time as it has been with me since I was a young child. Some unfortunate events in my young life cut open the spot for that BLACK HOLE, but I gotta put on my big girl panties...it's time to fix it :)
Amen sista! =) Iddy you said that so beautifully, it is EXACTLY what was making me hold on for 2 years. That metaphor of a child's blanket...yes, yes so true!
Acceptance is the key to letting go. I look at it this way: he is married. Even if he was my "soul mate", even if "I never felt this way before" blah blah blah, it doesn't matter because he's married. It should be a simple choice to us, but our hearts don't want to accept it. We think that if there is a will there is a way (sometimes), but marriage leads to dead ends. No way to change the course of what is. Accepting the truth, and knowing there is nothing he nor I can do, but let go.
"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together."
Atta girl! It's imperative to start with the "facts" if we are to ever reach acceptance. Thanks for the kind words and congrats on "getting it." You are on your way.....
"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together."
NC since Dec. 9th 2009
No Contact = No N
for me i think its because
DM~
<>
IMO, we fear letting go because we believe that it's protecting
~Iddy~
Amen sista! =)
Iddy you said that so beautifully, it is EXACTLY what was making me hold on for 2 years. That metaphor of a child's blanket...yes, yes so true!
Acceptance is the key to letting go. I look at it this way: he is married. Even if he was my "soul mate", even if "I never felt this way before" blah blah blah, it doesn't matter because he's married. It should be a simple choice to us, but our hearts don't want to accept it. We think that if there is a will there is a way (sometimes), but marriage leads to dead ends. No way to change the course of what is. Accepting the truth, and knowing there is nothing he nor I can do, but let go.
"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together."
NC since Dec. 9th 2009
No Contact = No N
Ilost,
<>
Atta girl! It's imperative to start with the "facts" if we are to ever reach acceptance. Thanks for the kind words and congrats on "getting it." You are on your way.....
((Hugs))
~Iddy~
Letting go for me would mean...