Reincarnation (just for laughs) :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2011
Reincarnation (just for laughs) :)
11
Thu, 04-26-2012 - 5:21pm

So, I have a real life friend that I've confided everything in & we were talking about my xap.

Sometimes you just have to die a little inside in order to be reborn and rise again as a stronger and wiser version of you!

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Community Leader
Registered: 06-08-2010
Thu, 04-26-2012 - 7:29pm
Just a slight correction to what she said (if I may add it)..."you and he HAD such a connection." Past tense, my dear. Connection = not in present time, nor future. Unless you choose to make it so. And you are not choosing that. :) :) :)

Hearts <3
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2011
Fri, 04-27-2012 - 9:44am
You never know! Having read "The Time Traveler's Wife" it is a possibility. You are lucky to have a confidante in RL - that is priceless. more good karma to you!
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2010
Fri, 04-27-2012 - 10:45am
Make sure he stays a part of your past life :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2010
Fri, 04-27-2012 - 10:50am
Guess I have a different view of this - you're still glamorizing your AP and further humiliating your H by telling others? If I remember right your AP told his college buddies also.........D-Day risk keeps rising here. Many D-days happen AFTER the A is "over". For both your sake and your H/children, be careful!
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2011
Fri, 04-27-2012 - 3:17pm

bthlman ~ I told her back when I was still involved with him.

Sometimes you just have to die a little inside in order to be reborn and rise again as a stronger and wiser version of you!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2010
Fri, 04-27-2012 - 3:42pm
Just concerned as you've come a long way in getting out of the A and would hate to see you have to deal with a dday. I actually wish I had someone to talk with/vent in RL about my A - I think it would help me keep my sanity (maybe). Even now 2 yrs later I've never spoken to anyone about it except for this board.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2010
Fri, 04-27-2012 - 4:15pm
Try therapy BTH..it helps
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2011
Fri, 04-27-2012 - 5:57pm

bthlman ~ I cannot imagine not having a real person to talk to!

Sometimes you just have to die a little inside in order to be reborn and rise again as a stronger and wiser version of you!
Community Leader
Registered: 06-08-2010
Fri, 04-27-2012 - 7:53pm
JWIA,
There are a few on this board who have told their H...we need to be extremely careful here and not say that would be "stupid". It is quite bold, yes, but some truly feel that they need to be COMPLETELY honest with their spouse. I know there are many on this board who are very strongly against telling because it is throwing hurt at their spouse unecessarily. When we choose to have our A, we are throwing our hurt at them anyway, even if they don't know it. Whether
someone chooses to tell or not, it isn't a
"stupid" thing. I guess one could say D-Days are stupid, too, but that is completely out of one's control. Guard yourself by not telling yourself that a D-Day could never happen to you. It can, and it is always
when you least expect it.
I refuse to get into any sort of debate about "to tell, or not to tell", because I did not tell and having gone through a D-Day and working very hard to keep complete transparency with my H and he is my accountability partner. Everyone is on their own journey and needs to do what they feel is best for their own situation.

That's my two cents, for what it's worth. :)

Hearts <3
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2011
Fri, 04-27-2012 - 10:54pm

I feel that the decision to tell or not is a personal one & everyone has to make their own choice.

Sometimes you just have to die a little inside in order to be reborn and rise again as a stronger and wiser version of you!

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