Revenge is sweet. . .

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-25-2003
Revenge is sweet. . .
5
Sun, 05-02-2004 - 8:47pm
my team beat xMM's little league team today 18-8. you must know how sweet that is for me, as you may remember, this is the team with 4--count them f-o-u-r coaches (because xMM HAD to coach on this team--along with a friend--so he could get to know "Mo." For most of the season, i have been alone coaching.

I did not speak to him at all or acknowlegde him--nor he me. I didn't care when he talked with his wife. But he did go over and speak to "Mo." And yes, that bothered me. But ok. What am i going to do?

It must seem strange to our mutal friends--that we no longer speak to one another. I did tell my asst. coach (also a good friend of xMM's) that xMM no longer talks with me, doesn't thank me for what i do--yada yada yada--as sort of a cover. For the most part though, i refuse now, to cover for all that has happened, by acting like nothing ever did. People must see the tension and know. And honestly, i don't care anymore. My mode now is self preservation.

He seemed happy and relaxed. He left the field early with his family.

He knows. If he has any conscience at all, and i think he does, he knows. Now, he can live with that.

Another important step for me. He knows--that i am gone; i dont' think he cares, but he knows.

Clarice

Avatar for shescomeundone2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Sun, 05-02-2004 - 10:07pm
After my A I spent alot of time thinking about what XOM thought, what he knew, how he felt, etc, etc....my therapist said "does it really matter" and the bottom line is NO. You hit the nail on the head when you mentioned "Self preservation"....take care of yourself Clarice and stop worrying about what XMM is thinking or doing or if he is happy. Sure, he looks happy but couldn't people say that about us when we were dying inside over our unhappy marriages? As for "Mo" wish the woman luck. It sounds like she is going to need it if she gets involved with XMM and finds herself in a position similar to where you were until things ended with him.

Jazzdiva

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 05-03-2004 - 12:38am

CONGRATULATIONS!


ON A


TERRIFIC GAME!!


It doesn't take a lot of coaches to make a good team. It only takes one good coach and you're one!! Way to go, Clarice!


iVillage Member
Registered: 07-25-2003
Mon, 05-03-2004 - 1:33am
you know, i am a good coach. I am all the things that i know OMWs turn out to be--soft and sweet and pretty and smart (why else would these stupid Xmms want us?) but yet, at the same time, i turn out to be one of the guys: one who can take a totally rag tag bunch or 9 year olds and make them into winners, by ACKNOWLEDGING their needs and playing their strengths and weaknessess. We are currently 7-1--with a 7th game winning strech, because i know how to make adjustments.

If only i could make them in my own heart/life BUT i am trying.

another day, week, month or year. I WILL ge there. that is a promise.



iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2004
Mon, 05-03-2004 - 8:47am
Clarice, you are sounding better all the time. You go, girl! I think about you in a new context these days because my son just started playing Little League. I usually get called upon to run the bench; ie., make sure the kids are in order, don't mess around, know who's on deck, etc., earning me the nickname "The Bench Nazi." ;-) Anyway, I always think about you out there... Funny how we touch each others' lives, even though we haven't ever met! :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Mon, 05-03-2004 - 10:11am

xOM's a jerk......


and a poor example of a coach.


You coach because you like to teach kids; NOT to salve your ego by winning.


Left with his family? Talked with the NEW replacement OW?


Rubbing it in your face?


Not much to mourn, is there?


Glad you're seeing his true colors while you're not in relationship any longer. A classic cake-eater.


It saddens me that you gave so much of yourself to your relationship with him and after all is said and done you truly meant so little to him.


Good luck on your next relationship. After the divorce........


You deserve to be first and recipient of full loving respectful attention, not an add-on.


cl-nre