Roll Call

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-20-2009
Roll Call
24
Mon, 06-06-2011 - 6:05pm

Trying to keep all of the EAS chickens straight can be difficult!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2011
In reply to: deeulta
Mon, 06-06-2011 - 6:14pm

Me::: I am in my 30's, single, life is full with great family and friends.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-16-2011
In reply to: deeulta
Mon, 06-06-2011 - 6:32pm

I am late 30's MW. Three children 16, 14 and 8. Had a six month A with MM, which was ea for the first 5 months and went pa when I seperated from my H. Have had a D-day and my H is wanting us to reconcile and we are working towards that (I am having to learn not to live by my emotions as I have been led by them my whole life). So I have made the choice to recommit to my M as my H is a wonderful man and has changed so much over these past two months and I owe it to him and my children to give our M my best shot. I have now been NC 20 days and am finding this has been a tough week but am moving through it.

The core of who you are is not always obvious to everyone. But to believe what others may believe of you can cause you to deny yourself, the wonders, of who you really are.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2008
In reply to: deeulta
Mon, 06-06-2011 - 6:38pm
Me: MW in my 30's. Been married for 15 years with 1 child. Xap is D but still in love with his x-wife. We had a 2 year on/off EA/PA. He ended the A last Wednesday and have not had any contact since. I am still struggling but I know that ending it was the best thing he could have done for me. I am now trying to work on my marriage.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-24-2011
In reply to: deeulta
Mon, 06-06-2011 - 7:08pm
Dee - what a great idea to do a roll call. Thanks for starting this :)

I'm Kat from Australia. I've been M to a great guy for a decade and we have 3 beautiful kids. All my life I've struggled with poor self-worth and poor boundaries. I was in an A for six years with a high-profile MM who lives in another city. He told me that his wife was cold, overweight, and that they never had sex. I met her once and she was warm, sensual, funny, and beautiful.

I tried to end the A more times than I can count and always got sucked back in by his "we'll always be friends" line.

I had several incremental D-days which hurt my H more than anyone in this world deserves to be hurt, yet I still carried on with the A. The final impetus for ending it came when xAP was on holiday with another family and my two young daughters (long story). When I sent a text to ask how my girls were doing he refused to answer me because he had "a rule against contact outside of work hours". So much for the 'friendship" he was always going on about. I may not have cared about myself enough to end the A, but I care about my kids more than anything in the world and when I saw that he had no more respect for them than he did for me it was over.

And that, thank god, was the day I found EAS and started to rebuild my life. This community has literally saved my life, and each and every one of you will always have my friendship and gratitude. ((Hugs)) to you all.

Kat
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2011
In reply to: deeulta
Mon, 06-06-2011 - 7:13pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-30-2011
In reply to: deeulta
Mon, 06-06-2011 - 7:19pm
MW, Late 30's, been with my DH for over 13 yrs with 2 kids. MMxAP, met his wife, became friends...A lasted on/off for 10 months. I told DH about it just over a month ago, and just this past weekend told DH ALL the details of the A. DH contacted xAP via call and email. DH did not and will not tell xAP's wife though. So, I have not had contact with xAP for 4 days. My DH is holding me accountable for ALL my actions. If i feel the need to break NC, then I call my DH first, so he can talk me out of it. It is a very good thing that he holds me accountable. I will not break NC again, now that I have him and this board. I am having a hard time WANTING to break it off, but i know I NEED to to move forward with my M and loving my DH. And, We do love each other and DH is willing to work on our marriage in which i am so thankful for. :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2011
In reply to: deeulta
Mon, 06-06-2011 - 11:01pm
Hey all! I'm early 30s been with H for 14 years total. I'm approximate one month out of a 6 month EA & PA with a MM. I have 3 wonderful kids that are my life...I am working on my M to keep my home life at it's best for my kids. My H knew about the A ( but not everything) shortly into it but there was never a dday on MMs part. I am here trying to put back the pieces of my life.
Regret for wasted time is more wasted time.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2011
In reply to: deeulta
Mon, 06-06-2011 - 11:27pm
Greetings! I'm in my early 30s and have been married to my H for almost 10 years. We have 2 children with special needs. My Xap is S. I was in an A with him for almost 2 years. I began NC 16 days ago after xap demonstrated just how cruel and controlling he could possibly be. Now working through the emotional layers I had tried to hide that led me to my need to have an affair. My H does not know about the affair, and I understand Dee regarding the feeling of co-parent/roommate relationship with H. (I am so grateful for this board and especially the responses to my first post. Not sure what I would have done without those comments of support and love.)
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2009
In reply to: deeulta
Mon, 06-06-2011 - 11:28pm
MW in my 30's. Nearly a year into ending an 8 yr LDA EA and PA w/ MM. I have no kids but an amazing husband. xAP has two kids. Had a D-day with my H, but as far as I know xAP's wife knows nothing. I am 7mos or is it 8 now ( I don't really count) no contact after I fished in Sept. xAP over the years has always responded to my fishing attempts throughout the years with many attempts at ending tho he seldom if ever fished. This time it is for good though. I have blocked him and know after the fall fishing that he blocked me. I live in Asia now and I am so happy to be on this adventure with my husband and literally on the other side of the world from xAP.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2011
In reply to: deeulta
Tue, 06-07-2011 - 2:12am
Newbie.

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