Sad to be here-new

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2011
Sad to be here-new
19
Fri, 01-28-2011 - 7:06pm

Hi.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2010
Sat, 01-29-2011 - 7:47am
Missed,

I am one of the women you are talking about (MW with SxAP). And yes, I am living proof that it WILL get worse! I stayed in that hell for 13 long months and it kept getting worse and worse. I hear you and understand FULLY when you say you felt like life was getting sucked out of you. That's what I felt day in day out with my narcissistic xAP.
It's been 3 months now NC and I feel FREE.
My sister says "Good riddance", and as much as it sounds mean, it's true!

I see no reason why you wouldn't be able to reconnect with your husband. I'm sure there's a strong foundation and history involved, think of all the reasons you married him. Think back and relive the wonderful "courtship" days you had with H. I often think back and reminisce about those days, it gives me a warm feeling in my heart. Then compare that with the A anxiety. Not worth it, right?

Texting and spending time is a great way to reconnect with H. I now text my husband throughout the day. And if you showed him attention/affection, you'd be surprised as to how he will respond.
I can say my marriage is better NOW than when I first started the dreaded A.

You're on your way now and I'm so happy for you :)

Big hugs.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2011
Sat, 01-29-2011 - 12:35pm

Garfy, I have been reading on ways to reconnect with DH.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2010
Sat, 01-29-2011 - 1:46pm
Missed,

Yes, the lying, cheating, sneaking was causing me so much anxiety too. Plus, I had to manage the double life, tend to both men's needs, having xAP always saying that it wasn't enough, all the arguments back and forth, it just wasn't worth it.

Now with half the effort, I am reconnecting with DH and I know he loves me, he will never do what xAP did and what he put me through. I was so stupid having the A.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2011
Sat, 01-29-2011 - 5:57pm

I am just thankful I didn't invest in more time with JAM and lose my DH.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2010
Sat, 01-29-2011 - 6:03pm
YOU can do this - YOU ARE doing it. We will be here every single step of the way cheering you on.

Much love,

TU.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-30-2010
Sat, 01-29-2011 - 7:02pm
Missed...tomorrow is the beginning of the rest of your life. It's funny how you realize how much DH means to you when you need him and he comes through. Take are of yourself and keep reading and you'll see in time that you'll have the strength to stay NC. Hugs....
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2010
Sat, 01-29-2011 - 8:26pm

I am so feeling you Missed....

you are so ahead of the game...well its not a game, but I am sure you get my point, you are on the right path. So refreshing to see ya here and posting like you do.

Luvin
Yo Soy EL Capitan de Mi Vida
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2010
Sat, 01-29-2011 - 9:51pm

Hi MissedAgain

Welcome to EAS.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2010
Sun, 01-30-2011 - 3:14am

Missed, your love for DH comes across loud and clear here.

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