Send him a goodbye email

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Send him a goodbye email
17
Mon, 06-20-2005 - 2:40pm

Of course he won't respect me but I took everyone's advice and sent exMM an email, short and sweet saying goodbye and this is too stressful for me and do not contact me again unless you have signed divorce papers in your hand. He can't even prove his court date now so I know that day will never come. I am prepared to ignore him with no contact.

A journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.

Thanks all,
Ivy

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-11-2004
Mon, 06-20-2005 - 2:46pm

Ivy,
I know that was a hard email to send. Just think, if he can't contact you anymore he can't lie to you anymore and he can't hurt you anymore with his broken promises. You deserve so much more than someone that will only be with you on his terms. I read the email he wrote you and what jumped out at me was how it was all about him. How could you do this to him, what about him?? Well, he can go to he!!....It is now about you and you deserve someone that realizes that....

AS

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 06-20-2005 - 3:07pm

Thank you!

My danger zones are email and text messaging so I know what to be careful of. Not bringing my computer home from work is a big help. No computer, no email access.

Of course no ivillage! :(

Ivy

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2005
Mon, 06-20-2005 - 3:48pm

Ivy

Congrats on takeing the forst step into a new life FREE of Deceit, time to leave the past in the past and to take the steps build a better future for you.

It should not be much of a trick to BLOCK his e-mails so that you can use your laptop at home if you want.

Free

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 06-20-2005 - 3:57pm
Unfortunately, embarrassed to admit, at this point I am like a addict when it comes to the email. I would easily just unblock him. For some reason I am very good at not seeing him but weak when it comes to things like email and texts.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2003
Mon, 06-20-2005 - 4:42pm

Good job, Ivy. I know it wasn't easy, but it's what you had to do.

I can totally relate to being like an addict with those darned text messages. This helps me a bit: think about whether when you receive the TM you really care who the sender is, or whether its just the drama and chaos the message brings into your life. I know for me, I've been out of my A for about 1 1/2 years, and I think a computer could generate those messages to me and get the same effect. IOW, it's not really about XMM sending the message, it's about the message itself.

He's very self-centered. Time for you to be IVY-centered. You can do it. Love, Mo.

mo 7-18-10

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-05-2005
Tue, 06-21-2005 - 8:35am
very nice! he'll be back.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2004
Tue, 06-21-2005 - 8:52am
Gee...that's consoling. Who in their right self respected mind would want this turdbag back?
**ID**

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2005
Tue, 06-21-2005 - 9:00am
I wonder if he would want himself back, can you say UCKY TURD ?
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-11-2004
Tue, 06-21-2005 - 9:21am
ITA with you ID...IVY is so much better off without him. He needs to climb back down into the sewer that he came from.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 06-21-2005 - 9:24am

Thanks everyone for all your advice and support!

I am feeling better today. We spoke last night after work on the phone and exMM tried his hardest to get me to sleep with him one more time for closure. He put up a good game about how the last time wasn't what he would have wanted because he didn't know it was going to BE the last time. I said, unless you are going off to war, noone knows its going to be the last time. It's been a month now since we've had IC and I had no intention of opening that door back up. So I told him to give me a call when he had the divorce papers in his hand, had sold their house, had his own apartment, and was ready to have an open and honest relationship. He said okay so I expect him to come back with all that somewhere between 2006 and never. He was all excited saying, thats a great plan! and I was like, yeah......take care now.......see ya.....bye

Naturally I do not expect him to honor this agreement since he's already shown that he has no honor but I am all set to ignore him. Sadly for him, no goodbye booty call for closure. My closure is the game I am going to with another guy tomorrow night. Oh well, xMM always has his left hand for closure. I'm sure he'll get a good grip on that one.

Ivy

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