Should I apologize to the W

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2010
Should I apologize to the W
3
Sat, 01-23-2010 - 11:32am

I was a member of EAS a long time ago. I had ended an A with a MM. I was S.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-17-2010
Sat, 01-23-2010 - 11:46am

No, I don't think you should apologize to her.

myShadow (cuz surely this isn't the real me)

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-16-2010
Sat, 01-23-2010 - 12:15pm
Write a letter to yourself apologizing for what you have done and just leave it at that. Don't contact her because it will only bring back memories of that dark time for her. And that's not good. It is not about asking for forgiveness from her, it is about forgiving yourself. So focus on self forgiveness and let this go.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2010
Sat, 01-23-2010 - 12:37pm

Thank you for your reply. I believe I am trying to deal with my own guilt. I have felt so guilty since I talked to her many years ago. The way she was so calm and dignified and I was so broken at that time. I know this is dumb but I kinda want to show her that I am no longer that person who is so selfish and only cares about what she wants. Don't stone me, please. I know I don't owe her anything but to never contact her H again. Which I never would.


The thing is that my life is so wonderful now. My H treats me incredibly well and I love him so much, but I keep thinking about what I did to her. It's funny how we don't think about what we are doing to the W. It's funny how we dismiss her completely when we are doing things to her H that only she should be doing. She became a real person to me when I spoke to her. I was talking to someone at work the other day and she made a comment about another girl we work with who was flirting with a MM. She said that this girl didn't realize that the MM