Should I talk to EXMM????????

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2003
Should I talk to EXMM????????
2
Mon, 05-17-2004 - 2:07pm
I need some input please.

My 5 month affair with a co-worker ended 3 months ago.

We still work together (he is a cop who works at my office).

We agreed to stay friends after the affair, and have managed to do so for the most part.

I feel like I am getting mixed signals from him all the time. He has gone back to giving me that certain look that lets me know he is interested.

I would have another affair with him. I wonder sometimes if he is waiting on me to bring the subject up. I want to have an affair with him again. We shared so much excitement together.

Neither of us plan on leaving our marraiges, so I know that it would just be an affair and nothing else. He shouldn't expect anything from me, nor me from him.

It is almost like an addiction. This if my first affair in my 20 yrs of marraige. I can't get this man off my mind.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2003
Mon, 05-17-2004 - 2:43pm
tempted~

Honestly, honey, I think you are sinking quickly.....what I see in your writing is a relapse already in the process of happening---its just a matter of time before you actually use the drug again (or in this case exMM). There will not be ONE person on this board who says "Yes, tempted, go to him" because we all know what heartache that entails.

However, that being said...you do what is right for you, and only you know the answer to that one. IF you feel that you need to go through with this again, then by all means, do so...just have your eyes wide open and know that you risk a lot in this process BUT you also can potentially grow tremendously too. But in my opinion, there is a much easier path to personal growth, a less painful one, than an affair. Some of us need to take the harder path to get there. hell, I have.

Your caught up in the excitement and the rush of this....and trust me, having been there PLENTY of times, I really don't think anyone could have swayed me from the process. Be careful....read often, post when you can.

big hugs...and lots of luck

dharma

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2003
Mon, 05-17-2004 - 9:08pm


NO

It is an addiction and emotional addiction and that makes you a junkie, addictions are distructive by nature and if you continue to give into it your going to pay a price for it starting with that 20 year marriage but not ending there SO THINK TWICE ABOUT IT, then don't do it.

You play with fire long enough I don't care how careful you are you get burned and so do the people in your life.