Slowly but surely
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Slowly but surely
| Wed, 03-02-2005 - 6:22pm |
I have been lurking here for several weeks and I have gotten so much stronger from reading your posts, I want to thank you all! You are all awesome! Don't underestimate yourselves, by going through this you can grow so much and can be a better person. You can have empathy towards others and be slow to judge, quick to help.
My story sounds pretty similar to all of yours. 2 yrs with mm, we worked together. The whole time he warned me how it would be. He had done this before, swore he would never do it again yet did with me but I don't blame him I wanted it too. We tried to stop many times but couldn't.
I took a new job and moved my family to a new area 6 months ago but kept talking to xmm thinking we could still be friends. A few weeks ago we talked seriously of our families and what we believed in and how it had to stop and then 2 weeks ago his brothers marriage broke up. (an affair) He called and said, "say goodbye," so I did, and after 2 weeks of nc I feel so much happier!
I went through being so sad and crying over everything and thinking I couldn't make it, to having a raging fit at a neighbor over something stupid this weekend, to finally starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I don't even want him to call, what would I say? And guess who was there for me the whole time? My H I told him as much as I could about the situation without letting him know. I told him I couldn't be friends with my xmm anymore because it was starting to be more then friends. I think he knows but I will never tell him. He dosen't deserve that. He has started trying so much harder even went to the doctors to see about his problems.
I wanted to encourage you guys to stay with it. There is hope and it is starting to feel good like the sun after a long cold winter.
My story sounds pretty similar to all of yours. 2 yrs with mm, we worked together. The whole time he warned me how it would be. He had done this before, swore he would never do it again yet did with me but I don't blame him I wanted it too. We tried to stop many times but couldn't.
I took a new job and moved my family to a new area 6 months ago but kept talking to xmm thinking we could still be friends. A few weeks ago we talked seriously of our families and what we believed in and how it had to stop and then 2 weeks ago his brothers marriage broke up. (an affair) He called and said, "say goodbye," so I did, and after 2 weeks of nc I feel so much happier!
I went through being so sad and crying over everything and thinking I couldn't make it, to having a raging fit at a neighbor over something stupid this weekend, to finally starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I don't even want him to call, what would I say? And guess who was there for me the whole time? My H I told him as much as I could about the situation without letting him know. I told him I couldn't be friends with my xmm anymore because it was starting to be more then friends. I think he knows but I will never tell him. He dosen't deserve that. He has started trying so much harder even went to the doctors to see about his problems.
I wanted to encourage you guys to stay with it. There is hope and it is starting to feel good like the sun after a long cold winter.

~jstmekc~
How do you spell relief? "Ba-bye" :)
It's like having to learn how to walk again. Baby steps...one foot in front of the other. After all, we were crawling through the sludge for however long thinking, "Hey this is different!" Yeah, right.
<<<It is all about me and I finally began to realize just how selfish I am.>>>
Not a very exciting lightbulb moment, but the place where we all need to start.
Good luck,
M~