snowballing

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2010
snowballing
9
Sat, 07-24-2010 - 1:45pm

This morning I woke up to a flooded basement :( Today is XAP's birthday and I have to get ready in a few minutes for this wedding I have to go to. I'm exhausted from 500 trips up and down the stairs trying to salvage what I can. I'm starting to feel very sorry for myself. Tired, sad, lonely, angry, scared, anxious, etc......

Going to try to pull myself out of it. I'm sure it will be better once I'm there. Right now I just want to crawl back in bed :(

Bodhi

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-01-2010
In reply to: bodhi2010
Sat, 07-24-2010 - 2:24pm

Bodhi,


I'm so sorry you're going through this right now... I hope you're enjoying yourself at the wedding, try your bestest.


We're all thinking of you.


Love Piku

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2010
In reply to: bodhi2010
Sat, 07-24-2010 - 3:42pm

Okay - that just SUCKS. So sorry to hear about the flooding.

It's hard isn't it ... when Life's troubles just continue to arise? It's like, 'hey Universe, can't you see I am trying to deal with the whole ending an A thing?!' I feel this way sometimes ... like I should only have to deal with ending the A and NOTHING ELSE because it is taking so much outta me to just manage that. Unfortunately, other crap happens and we just gotta take these issues/concerns in stride. They aren't snowballing; instead RL is happening at the same time as we are coping - they are running parallel.

But you know what? You are going to rock out tonight in that new dress and I can't wait to hear how the evening went. The highs & the lows. Be gentle on yourself, don't expect too much, and do whatever you can to block out or silence those inner voices that are going to try and poo poo your evening. This evening is about you and no one else.

Much Love,

TU.

LC/NC since April 14, 2010

"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it."
— Maya Angelou

LC/NC since April 14, 2010

"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it."
— Maya Angelou
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2010
In reply to: bodhi2010
Sun, 07-25-2010 - 5:36pm

Hi everyone -

Flooded basements - blechhhh. It could be worse - we have an older home and it's happened before, so a lot of stuff is up on pallets. Mother Nature's way of making you clean house I guess.

TU -
<<>>

That made me smile - I totally agree!

The evening at the wedding went better than I expected actually! It was absolutely beautiful. I got myself in a better frame of mind as I was driving and didn't expect too much - so it ended up OK. I felt great in my dress - and a couple of 20-something girls in the bathroom complimented me and asked me where I got it! Now that's the kind of ego boost a gal in her mid-40s needs.

It was markedly different than other events I've gone to by myself. I wasn't completely miserable. I did think of XAP several times, but the thoughts came in and went right out. I thought of all of you mostly! I don't know what I'd do without this board.

Bodhi

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2008
In reply to: bodhi2010
Sun, 07-25-2010 - 6:30pm

Hey Bodhi,


How did you get all the water outta the basement? Pumps with tubes or the ol’ bucket bail method? Hopefully whatever caused the flood was not too expensive to fix.


I’m so very happy the wedding went well and it sounds like you were working it and owning it in that dress! You go gurl!


Much love and big hugs,


E1


Whether you think you can or you think you can’t you are probably right.

Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2010
In reply to: bodhi2010
Sun, 07-25-2010 - 6:39pm

Yippee Bodhi!

I am so happy to hear that your night went better than expected: can't expect more than that (-:

That's a big deal to get through - I know xAP made you account for your movements (what a jack-a by the way). I bet you looked stunning.

And thank you so much for your support to me. I absolutely love that quote and will hold it close to me as the waves of sadness continue. I am feeling a bit better and have many great things to look forward to in the next couple of weeks.

Thanks again (-:

TU.

LC/NC since April 14, 2010

"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it."
— Maya Angelou

LC/NC since April 14, 2010

"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it."
— Maya Angelou
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2010
In reply to: bodhi2010
Sun, 07-25-2010 - 8:11pm

Well, I started the old fashioned way with a bucket but it would have taken me FORever!! Plus when I first started I think the water was still rising. My awesome neighbor let me use their pump. Unfortunately the problem can't be fixed - when it rains hard for hours and hours, the city's drains can't handle it (at least the sewer my house connects to) and the rain water comes back up through the drains in my basement. It's happened before - but not too often. My house is old and historic, so very cool in a lot of ways - but not in others - no sump pump, no air conditioning, no first floor bathroom. Sacrifices!

Thank you (((E1)))

Bodhi

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2010
In reply to: bodhi2010
Sun, 07-25-2010 - 8:15pm

Thank you (((TU)))

<<<>>

That was the best part - just being there - not keeping "track" of who was there, who I talked to, etc.

I'm glad you liked the quote :) And I'm glad you are feeling a little better too. Thinking of you -

Bodhi

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-20-2009
In reply to: bodhi2010
Sun, 07-25-2010 - 8:40pm

Bodhi,
Sorry to hear about your basement, but you live in a historic and probably very charming home so I'm not crying you a river. ha. Good thing, or your basement would floor again.

I, too, went to an event last night. It's an annual thing for my work. This time last year, X gave me sh*t about wearing a dress he thought was too sexy and he had a 'wobbly' and cut me off for three days with NC. I thought about that last night and was thanking my lucky stars that I didn't have his opinion to worry about - I didn't have to fret that press would be there and I'd be 'caught' looking anything more than frumpy. Feeling possessed and controlled TOTALLY rubs me the wrong way and I'm so very thankful to be rid of the stress that comes with feeling like I'm in trouble for being ME. I'm glad you had a nice time at the wedding and rocking that 'mid-40s' stuff for all it's worth!!! Go, Girl!

Love,
Dee

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2010
In reply to: bodhi2010
Tue, 07-27-2010 - 9:50am

Dee -

<<>>

I completely relate - XAP would make comments about my clothes too. And it's not like I ever dressed like a tramp. He would say things like you better make sure you don't bend over too much in that blouse, etc. And he asked me all the time what I was wearing. It was so transparent - if I had a meeting that he knew only included women, no questions but if there was a chance men were going to be there it was a different story. If he was so worried about me looking good to other men, you'd think he'd make himself available right?!

<<<>>>

I'm so thankful for you too :) And I'm getting there. It's just nice to not constantly feel like I'm doing something wrong. And it's nice to be able to wear things that show off the body I work so freaking hard to maintain ;)

Bodhi