So much wisdom here...

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-05-2010
So much wisdom here...
6
Mon, 05-24-2010 - 10:22am

Good Morning Ladies!


Been reading many posts here the last few days about finger pointing, forgiveness, unanswered prayers, gratefulness, and acceptance. It never ceases to amaze me that I learn each

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2009
Mon, 05-24-2010 - 11:59am

Dear Healing,


What a beautiful, yet painfully honest

   ~Iddy~ 


iVillage Member
Registered: 04-05-2010
Mon, 05-24-2010 - 12:12pm

THANK YOU IDDY!


I appreciate your words and honesty. I have a LONG way to go and am painfully aware of that. 84 days is still definitely newbie territory! I honestly feel like I should be further along in this process. I remember reading Jane's post around this time and she was (or at east sounded) so strong and so on her way to mental health and well being! I am not there and I will certainly continue to post and gain perspective and wisdom. This has become a life line of sorts for me and when I am having bad moments I take solice (sp?) in the fact that I am not alone.


The forgiveness thing though... I am definitely well aware that it needs to be done, towards him as much as me. He is no more to blame for this than I am. That is a hard pill to swallow, but I know the truth in it. Thank you again, you are truly an amazing woman. Have a great Monday! It is a good one... since it is a holiday!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2009
Mon, 05-24-2010 - 3:33pm

Yes, you have a long way to go but the good news, Healing, is that you are only 6 days away from earning your Tweener Wings so no pressure here, but

   ~Iddy~ 


iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2010
Mon, 05-24-2010 - 7:37pm

Dear Healing,

I would like to thank you too for the beautiful and inspiring post! I can't wait until we are celebrating your tweener wings. You bring so much to this board - your insight and wisdom, struggles and authenticity are such gifts.

TU.

LC/NC since April 14, 2010
LC/NC since April 14, 2010

"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it."
— Maya Angelou
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-05-2010
Mon, 05-24-2010 - 8:03pm

Thanks TU! I feel the same way about your posts!!! Am I wrong assuming you were longer along in NC and had to start over?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2010
Mon, 05-24-2010 - 8:25pm

Thanks!

Yes I broke NC twice ... once when he said that he was leaving W, had a planned Dday and was out looking for places to live, then changed his mind, and the second time was when he sent me an s.o.s. message after a serious incident and i was fool enough to respond.

Against his 'wishes', I initiated NC each time.

Took me a while to learn my lessons - but I think once you REALLY do, you move on without looking back. Also, once my H moved out (almost a year ago) - the affair fog started to thin immediately, so I got into therapy and started working the work to end it. I want to reconcile with my H more than anything, and I want to do it knowing I have done the work needed to make our home an emotionally safe place for him to be again. I knew ending it would be a process, and I knew I needed to get things in place to assist me to finally succeed.

I got better ending each attempt I made ...

I hope you have an amazing week too! At least we know it is going to end with you in wings!

TU.

LC/NC since April 14, 2010

"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it."
— Maya Angelou

LC/NC since April 14, 2010

"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it."
— Maya Angelou