Staying the course

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2012
Staying the course
2
Wed, 01-23-2013 - 11:32pm

Things have been going so well.  NC initiated by me 1/8/13 and all was quiet.  Until tonight.  I'm not sure how, but he got my new # and has been texting.  I had prepared myself for this, as he's pretty resourceful when he wants to be.

I've blocked every # that he has used so far and deleted.  But, it's been hard.  I just wanted to look forward and not deal with this anymore.  I will not reply because that's what he wants.  There is nothing left to say to him. 

After telling him point blank do not contact me in any way, this feels like a violation of my privacy and just disrespectful.  I'm not sure why I expected anymore from him. 

I'm not going back into this endless circle of hurt and anger.  It will always result in the same ending. 

Going to stay the course and not reply.  Not now, not ever.  I want my self respect back.  I want to feel safe.  This is the only way.

 

Avatar for ratherbeme
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2010
Thu, 01-24-2013 - 8:18am

It takes fortitude and determination, to maintain NC when he is determined like that.

Be forewarned, this is a fight for your life. He plays it like a game, but you are really fighting for your life to get out of this. Many newbies think of it as a compliment that AP is showing interest. What a mistake. What a fantasy!! That thinking keeps them involved.

Keep the course. Nothing wrong with it at all. It is the right thing. You have the right words. If your true feelings match you are in good shape.

It's tough to reject, and to be rejected, when we hang onto the fantasy. The ending of all A's are about rejection sooner or later. And fantasy.

Keep the course. We are all pulling for you.

Rather....

We only miss what could have been. I know I don't miss what it really was.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2012
Thu, 01-24-2013 - 8:34am
Hey Blonde, Nice to hear things are going well and you are staying steadfast, determined and strong. That's half the battle, finding the determination to work towards a better life.. You are out of the circle and walking straight away - keep walking and don't look back. Keep blocking and deleting. RBM is so right, it is a game to him, with you being a pawn that he thinks he can move and place anywhere. You've taken yourself off the board and now he has nothing to play with. Game over. I don't think you'll ever place yourself on the board again. Every day you stay NC you are gaining more and more of your self respect. I respect you for having the courage and determination to finally walk away. Stay the course Blonde. You sound strong..... ((hugs)) Sunny Soon Xx