Steps for the newbies
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Steps for the newbies
| Tue, 07-13-2010 - 1:49pm |
The following are the basic 'rules' of ending an A.
| Tue, 07-13-2010 - 1:49pm |
The following are the basic 'rules' of ending an A.
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Right On,
I’m lovin your new moniker and I’m lovin this post!
Looks like you have taken some big-mother-gig-mammoth steps in the reality department! Good stuff!
It’s hard to see that when we don’t do “everything” in our power to remove xAP from our life i.e. if we do not block, changing email addresses or phone numbers when possible the only person we are hurting and inevitably NOT protecting is ourselves. It’s dangerous to even leave the door cracked. I know you have learned that the hard way. Looks like you’ve got it down now!
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I love this…(hmm E1 is coveting that phrase…can I borrow it ?)
Much love and big hugs,
E1
Whether you think you can or you think you can’t you are probably right.
Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.
Good for you Babysteps. These are the rules. And we are all given these rules when we post here and join this community. It takes time for people to really internalize, but it sounds like you have. Good luck on the rest of your healing journey.
Hugs,
NC/LC since January 28, 2010
http://secretlifeofjane.wordpress.com/
NC/LC since January 28, 2010
http://secretlifeofjane.wordpress.com/
MovingON
Babysteps,
You are on the right track. You are reading, posting, responding to others and that shows you are making progress. Its a long journey, this whole A recovery, but its worth it.
Stay on this road and go at a slow pace. I tried to rush the healing many times and it just cant be done. Allow yourself time to heal, be patient with yourself and most of all love yourself.
Thanks for posting this!
GMLB
Thank you Babysteps for this post.
pandabear-that is the hardest one for me too. i keep fantasizing that years down the line we might be friends, but i know its not possible. AP and i were friends first, so losing the friendship is especially hard. but i reality, i'm not friends with ANY of my exes, so why should this be different?
its a toughie; just wanted to empathize that i'm struggling with that one too.
Thank you Babysteps!
Such a great post, full of insight and I really enjoyed reading it. It's funny - for me I don't miss the 'friendship' even though at one point we were making drastic plans to be together in RL. Throughout the A I had several moments of clarity wherein I realized if we were really friends, we wouldn't be doing this to one another. We wouldn't be asking one another to become the people we had just to get our fix. How terribly shameful behaviour for 'friends'.
TU.
LC/NC since April 14, 2010
"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it."
— Maya Angelou
"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it."
— Maya Angelou
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