Strength in the truth

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-04-2004
Strength in the truth
7
Thu, 03-04-2004 - 4:02pm


I posted a message last month titled "is it REBOUND or REAL?" about a situation where I was the other girl involved with an engaged man who is to be married on May 15. A lot has happened since then. I came to see the truth, and see this individual for who he is, not the fun we had. He lies, cheats, and doesn't value the sanctity of marriage. Anyhow, when I faced the truth right on the head, stood right in it, I realized that this man is not a man I would want in my life, on a long term basis. I chose not to give him any closure, but to just begin no contact. It's been difficult, but I'm trying my hardest. Someday he may return. Maybe he won't return. My choice in this matter is not to be there for him if he does. I'm afraid I won't be strong enough, but I'll do my hardest. Everything inside of me will want it, but I'm going to be strong. Because it's the truth. Men like this are dawgs.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2003
Fri, 03-05-2004 - 7:43am
Isn't it amazing how when we step away from the A we see things so much more clearly.

I wouldn't want to be married to my XMM, that's for sure.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-20-2003
Tue, 03-09-2004 - 9:13pm


"I wouldn't want to be married to my XMM, that's for sure."

I have to second that!! There is no way I would put up with all of x-MM's BS. He will never grow up, and I have no room in my life for a 30-year old child. All the heartache of "will he call" "where is he" "who is he with"... gone!!! Good riddance!!! Let his W worry about that crap. I'm done.


Comp

~feeling a little angry right now~

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-19-2003
Tue, 03-09-2004 - 9:34pm
My xOM is 33 and has never been even close to being married...wonder why?! I knew from the beginning that he was quite the bullshooter and a liar, but I guess I didn't pay attention through his great looks and charm. Also, I just wanted some fun on the side so I figured what the heck. NO, I was wrong, even just wanting fun on the side, I got hurt by his constant lies to me and reckless disregard for my feelings. I lied to my H, but I don't ever remember lying to xOM. I can't remember a time my H lied to me. Go figure..it's things like this that make me feel so messed up. C
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-04-2004
Wed, 03-10-2004 - 10:50am
After a few days of no contact to this man, he called last night. Him and his fiance began their premarital counseling last night. It took all I had not to answer and not return his call, BUT I DID IT!!! These men mess with our heads, and then we think we are crazy. But it's them. Celebrate with me, PLEASE!!! I'm proud of myself!!! Because it's the hardest thing to do to not pick up the phone and call!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-20-2003
Thu, 03-11-2004 - 1:17pm


All-right jlt!!!!

that's awesome.... it makes you feel so much better about yourself, doesn't it? to know that you CAN stop the game.

stay strong!!!

Comp

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-04-2004
Thu, 03-11-2004 - 5:14pm
Way to go !!! I only hope I can do the same when the phone rings...because I know it's just a matter of time.

You're an inspiration !!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-04-2004
Mon, 03-15-2004 - 9:56am
He has called from his number that I used to contact him at& I don't answer those calls. however, beware of the numbers we don't know. This morning, on my way to work, an odd number called, and it looked like a friend's work number, but it was him calling me from work. i pretended that I couldn't hear him, kept saying hello, hello... hello... and then just hung up. The sick part is, he's been on my mind. There was no conversation, but he is on my mind. Saved the number to his name (J) and now won't answer to that number. I don't want him to be able to hear my voice. Just things for those who are doing their darndest to move on to think about..