on the subject of letters...

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-25-2010
on the subject of letters...
13
Sat, 12-04-2010 - 8:24pm

I'm here, quiet, trying to keep my emotions in order and things in check - the holidays are doing a real number on me.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-25-2010
Sun, 12-05-2010 - 12:20pm
WIWWM - (I hope you change your moniker since NOTHING is wrong with YOU :)) - THank you.

Thank you for your compliment and your posting - I don't know your whole story (trying to catch up on all the reading today) but I hope you choose to stay and fight for your marriage. Being married is more than intimacy and more than just living in the same home - it is trust, and selfless love, and celebration and joy - and it is worth it if you have a second chance. The hardest part is recommitting yourself and entrenching your efforts with the same diligence that you did during the A -

I know now that my xap was also a serial cheater (not that that matters) and cake eater -and I was simply one more notch in his universe. Since I broke contact not once but twice to answer fishing attempts - my struggle clearly is with my self and not really with him. I think all of us wish for a time machine at some point - a do over - and validation that were weren't just a mistake or a blip on the radar - but the truth is, at the end of the day - that is all we might have been and we have to accept that in some way and move forward. That ability to say no more, the commitment to NC and moving forward is the part that we need to see as our victory.

I hope your holidays are good - and that you also find strength in healing.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2004
Sun, 12-05-2010 - 4:55pm
Lolly I agree with everyone, you write so beautifully. This past weekend I have also thought of the mistakes I have made and I'm working still on forgivness. I think it might help to not think of our past actions as mistakes but lessons we have learned well and never repeated:)
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2010
Sun, 12-05-2010 - 9:50pm

Dear Lolly

I am so sorry you are going through all this, i cannot begin to image all the pain and grief you have gone through, all i can tell you is that please remain to be the amazing, beautiful, and strong person person that you are, and please don't forget to have hope. Tomorrow will be a better day. You have gone through so much that the universe can only bring wonderful things to you from now on. I also wanted to thank you for your posts, they have helped me so much.

All my love

V888

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