T0: CL-Noregretsever
Find a Conversation
T0: CL-Noregretsever
| Thu, 10-07-2004 - 5:20pm |
Hello again. Thanks so much to you and all of the others for replies to my posts. Well, my divorce is only 4 days away. I am trying to be strong and prepare myself for the ending of my 24 year marriage. I wanted this, yet, it is still so hard. I have wanted out for several years, but I must admit that my EMA was the final straw that killed my marriage. Fortunately, I made it until the kids were grown. My children are now 18, 19 and 20, so I made it until they were grown. They are not out of the house yet, but at least they are of adult age and I feel a little bit better about ending the marriage. My husband is ready for the marriage to end also, especially since he found out about my past EMA. My husband wants to be at the divorce hearing, so that will make it even harder, but I know that I will make it. We are actually getting along better now that we are living apart. I am currently in counseling. I want to get my self together before I ever start another relationship. As far as ex-OM goes, I still hope to be with him someday. But, I have decided that I am not going to go up and talk to him about a relationship with him with divorce papers in my hand. I just can't do that. That just seems like a terrible way to approach someone about dating them. I probably won't even say anything to him. He will see the divorce in the newspaper, so he will know then that I went through with it. Then if he wants to come and talk to me, I will be around. I feel like it is better to let him come to me since he has been divorced for a while and he has been dating. I know that he has a lady that he has been dating and I wouldn't want to interfere with that or any other dates that he might have. I will just wait and see if he comes to me. It is going to be hard, but I think that waiting to see what he does is the best answer. If he truly still loves me and wants me, then he'll come to me. If not, then I will just have to accept it. Right now, I just need to get through this divorce hearlng next week. Please continue to post to me. I can always use encouragement.

You're very welcome.
You'll get through the divorce proceedings. And yes, there is a lot of sadness at the present moment.
Yet, there is also hope for you and your family. The fighting has ended. You and stbxh have elected to stop fighting or looking for solace outside of your marriage and face up to the fact the marriage was over several years ago.
You're not alone or unique. Many divorces happen because of a need to end the fighting.
I was one of those, too.
You and your family will heal. Keep up with the counseling.
As for xOM and you and your divorce papers
Hi Southerngirl, I read your post here and it sounds like you have a healthy attitude.