Time for a Roll Call

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2009
Time for a Roll Call
36
Mon, 03-21-2011 - 7:03am

The board has been real quiet and I hope that's a good thing. :smileywink: Also, a

Be where you are; otherwise you will miss your life. ~ Buddha
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-31-2011
Mon, 03-21-2011 - 12:18pm

7 weeks out of ending for me - had a bit of LC due to some work functions, but strictly professional.

I am so doing SO much better than the first few weeks.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-23-2010
Mon, 03-21-2011 - 12:44pm

Hi Iddy:

I'm here.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-13-2010
Mon, 03-21-2011 - 1:45pm

Hello, hello, hello!

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2010
Mon, 03-21-2011 - 3:18pm

I'm still around :) Just taking a "breather" to see what real life feels like these days. My A lasted 7.5 years and I've been free for almost 9 months now! I will be eternally grateful for eas. Life is a LOT easier when you give up trying to control it and stop living a hidden life. The universe has a plan for each of us - we're just along for the ride. I'm still healing. I know it's hard for newbies to understand this, but letting go of xap and the A is the "easy" part. Looking within and figuring out the "whys" is the challenge. But it's all worth it. YOU'RE worth it. :)

"To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don't need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself." ~ Thich Nhat Hanh

Bodhi

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2011
Mon, 03-21-2011 - 3:43pm

Hi Gang,

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-05-2010
Mon, 03-21-2011 - 3:55pm

Hi everyone! Been reading everyday, haven't been posting a great deal this time around...but listening. I am almost a month into NC this time around. I made it over 3 months NC last year, it has been an 8 year A...and I am struggling with real life. Things with H have been rocky this past week...I am scared, I am angry and I am just not sure if we will make it. There has never been a DDay, and I know that I need a LOT of work on ME before I can make things work here at home. We talk so much but change so little in our rections to each other and all that goes on around us. It isn't working and I feel so empty right now... just struggling. Thanks Iddy. Hope everyone continues this journey to peace and happiness.

Healing

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2009
Mon, 03-21-2011 - 4:45pm

Hi Everyone-

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-24-2011
Mon, 03-21-2011 - 5:31pm
Hi Iddy, I'm here everyday. Present and accountable. Eight weeks and one day NC out of a six year A with a MM and I'm feeling stronger every day.

I'm facing a lot of "anniversary events" over the next month, along with three more work trips to the city where he lives. (In retrospect, it must have been so convenient for him to have me staying in a five star hotel right beside his work for three days each fortnight - no cost, no hassle, little risk of interfering with his RL) NC doesn't come naturally yet - its still a deliberate decision that I have to make and remake each day - but EAS gives me the courage to know that I'm doing the right thing for myself and my family.

XAP continues to fish occasionally - first the guilt trip (how could you do this after everything we shared?), then the abuse (your cold and unpleasant personality has finally been revealed), and now the sugar-coated sweetness (I'll be in your neighbourhood this week and would like to return one of your books that I enjoyed). Each time he calls from a new number or uses a new email to get through to me, I simply take a big breath, press hang up or delete, and add another brick to the wall that preserves my space of safety and healing.

At home, my M has wonderful days where we laugh and connect and delight in each other's company. And hard days where the simple act of responding to an email or working away from home sends my H into a spiral of doubt and suspicion. But the good days are slowly outnumbering the bad, and our love is strong enough that I know we will survive.

EAS has been my lifeline for the last two months. To Iddy and all the vets and tweeners especially - thank you for all the good that you do, and for the serenity and strength you bring to people's lives.

Smiles and sunshine

Kat.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2010
Mon, 03-21-2011 - 5:41pm
Happy to see you RBM!! Good for you and thanks for letting us know you are still around...please post...we are here to carry you thru should you need it...
Luvin
Yo Soy EL Capitan de Mi Vida
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2010
Mon, 03-21-2011 - 5:43pm
Nice to have YA!! Love having the MPOV....please post and lean on us. We are here!! 2 of you in one roll call. COOL...
Luvin
Yo Soy EL Capitan de Mi Vida