today is a little easier

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2009
today is a little easier
3
Tue, 09-29-2009 - 8:34am

Day 2 of LC. Yesterday was really difficult; Mondays are when

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2008
Tue, 09-29-2009 - 8:59am

each day of NO CONTACT gets easier and easier. at first, it is so hard and it takes the effort of antsteps caught in a pool of honey. but, ants in honey eventually keep marching and flailing..then they escape the honey and begin a determined march away from the morass.


as one that was in LC/work, it was extra hard. but we've all heard the WORDS; ie: i'm numb, my M is bad/until i met you, i need a break, i wanne just be friends, he's not mean/bad/is a good guy/a best friend.


but think about it: he disappears for the weekend- when the supposedly bad M, where his heart hearth and home is...and you are cast aside like old tissue until his ego beckons you back on monday to come charging to the rescue for his feel-goods.


that's what A's are about. and is he a 'good guy' or a man that is not mean if he cheats and reduces his own M to screaming and fighting- only to seek ego stroking and succor with another woman?


no, you do not need a break. ending is not in slow disappearance. it is not in responses- however weak. it is total and complete NO CONTACT, which is part of the healing process and helps the rosy, muddy goggles come off the nose where they've been glued on for way too long. one day of NO CONTACT!!! congrats- now, tuesday is the first day of the rest of your life. no more responding. no more eating chocolate when you are dieting.

CL-Lovely Starr

"No memory of having starred; atones for later disregard; or keeps the end from being h

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2009
Tue, 09-29-2009 - 9:23am
Thank you so much, I needed to read all of that! A few times!
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2005
Tue, 09-29-2009 - 11:00am

You are absolutely correct in your thinking that the affair is contributing to the downfall of his marriage.


It pretty much goes for any married affair partner...man and woman.