Turned the corner

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2004
Turned the corner
3
Fri, 05-14-2004 - 12:50pm
Whew. This week was a tough one, and I still don't know why. I just got trapped in a "thinking about the OM" mode. I've had an irrational fear all week that something bad has happened to him. And no, I'm not about to use that as some lame excuse to contact him. But I did obsess about it for awhile, and about the fact that if something happened to him, how would I ever know?? I have been very down on myself because here it has been 5.5 months and I'm *still* obsessing about this man??? He's still taking up way too much of my time & energy, at least mentally. I thought by now I'd have made some progress.

Well, it hit me last night that the fact that I am not *acting* on my obsession should be considered progress, right? I think that without you guys here to report to, I probably would have succumbed to the temptation to call or write him to check up on him. So, thanks for being there. Today I feel the obsession subsiding, and feel like I'm getting back to normal. Thank god. For a few days there, I thought I was going to be stuck in this pathetic cycle forever, but today I'm feeling some hope.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-07-2004
Fri, 05-14-2004 - 1:35pm
I have been in the same mode this week. Thought of XMM all week. Unlike your mine thought were of him with a new OW. Darn that makes me crazy and starts the obsessing again. Have to try to get past this.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2003
Fri, 05-14-2004 - 2:57pm
This week marks 4 weeks of NC for me not seeing or hearing from MM at all. I'm managing pretty well, alot of the time I don't think about him, like on the weekends and at night usually I'm busy and don't really have the time to obsess about him. Sometimes when I do think about him, I feel kind of sad, thinking that I'll never have a physical relationship that great ever again (H not interested in sex). But other times when I think of MM, I try to tell myself that he is a user, and then just ignores me when it suits him. Even if he's feeling guilty and thinks we should end it, he could at least have the courtesy to tell me so (we were seeing each other for 2+ years).

But no, he just left me hanging with no explanation, no goodbye, no kiss my a$$. nothing at all.

Its pretty sad to think that I allowed myself to be used by a person who doesn't have even enough respect for me or care enough about me to tell me goodbye.

Take care everyone,

Dusty

xxxx
Avatar for kassieree
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-29-2003
Sat, 05-15-2004 - 1:09am
I also found myself obsessing about XMM this week. Particularly yesterday. Its been nearly 7 momths since he moved away without even saying goodbye. And i haven't heard a word since. And then last night i dreamed of him for probably the first time ever. Can't really remember the dream just that he & his W were in it.

I also feel like i was used. By someone who was just looking for a bit of fun before he left. As we had a period of 4 months when we didn't talk at all & he totally ignored any communication i made with him but then suddenly decided he wanted to see me again.

I do still think about him most days & still stupidly check reguarly for that email or text msg that doesn't come, but on the whole i don't obsess anymore. What is it with all this obsessing we are all experiencing? Must be something in the air.