UGH

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2010
UGH
10
Sat, 01-15-2011 - 7:02am

Well thats all

You are what you consistently do
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2010
Sat, 01-15-2011 - 9:14am

Hi Iggy,

You made me giggle

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2010
Sat, 01-15-2011 - 12:44pm
Ugh indeed!! You both made me laugh. Cheers to the laughter through the tears!!
Oct. 12, 2010 -- began my personal search and rescue mission.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2004
Sat, 01-15-2011 - 1:47pm
Iggy:) you said it perfect, we cannot lose site of the hurts and only remember the sometimes feels goods that happened. We are now on the road to getting those feel goods from ourselves. It's amazing where they can come from, a good song, a tasty cup of tea or a smile from a stranger. We are emerging as people into the best we can be!
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2010
Sat, 01-15-2011 - 2:28pm

"Some days I just get all nostalgic and stupid about the fantasy when it was in full flight."

***

Something to take the shine off those memories, is to think about ALL the crap that went into making those moments happen ... the people who would be DEVASTATED by your little "fantasy" world. I bet even the nicest memory would not shimmer if you shifted your focus toward the lies, manipulation and coercion you both used to get away with it all. It's like getting nostalgic about the best shot of heroin you took ... instead of the tricks you had to turn to buy the drug. It's just plain self-destructive nonsense that you have the ability to control once you realize what you're doing. Also time to figure out what's going on in you're life on those "days" ... those aren't just random days, something is happening in your real life, or within side you to make daydreaming about that stupid affair seem like a good idea. REMEMBER positive thoughts based on the fantasy should be a warning signal to you that you're trying to seek comfort in all the wrong places.

Dig deep Iggy.

TU.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-25-2010
Sat, 01-15-2011 - 3:05pm

Hi Iggy

UGH indeed..... try PHEW..................

you didnt have a dday

New Choices, New Chapter,


New Challenges,

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2010
Sat, 01-15-2011 - 6:55pm

Oh wow- see this is EXACTLY what I love about EAS. Its bloody amazing- your collective responses EXACTLY capture the strength of this board.

My initial post was full of exasperation, annoyance, fristration bordering on semi-depression. All of which we experience in the RL aftermath of indulging our selfish 'wants' in thw worst possible way.

There were a few responses of support, empathy, and a recognition that 'this too shall pass' and a laugh togeher as friends sharing some mutual crap.

Then TU made me realise that these bouts of nostalgia are truly just the response to a trigger where my mind is looking for any distraction. Dig deep she said- and thats spot on- why

You are what you consistently do
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2010
Sat, 01-15-2011 - 7:02pm

What a great, reflective response IGGY,

"I cant believe I am still being selfish and only dealing with my crap. I should be rejoicing that my sins were never found out and I can start life afresh."

And realizing ... that at any time, it could ALL come out. So appreciate each and every moment you have, each loving glance, each second of kindness ... take none of it for granted.

It is a gift that many of us no longer have.

With Love,

TU.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2010
Sat, 01-15-2011 - 7:08pm

So true TU- I take so much for granted. I have a loving (albeit distracted) H and a great family. I dont know why I act so destructively- maybe I need some IC .

Iggyx

You are what you consistently do
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2010
Sat, 01-15-2011 - 7:27pm
"maybe I need some IC"

there is no maybe about it. We all did/do.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2010
Sat, 01-15-2011 - 7:36pm

Ok yes I agree. Im going to do it!! Watch this space. 2011 is my year for ME!!!

Iggyx

You are what you consistently do