Ugh

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2009
Ugh
19
Mon, 07-19-2010 - 11:53am

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2010
Mon, 07-19-2010 - 12:06pm

(((Alice)))

Delete it and rewind your life back to when you got up this morning. Nothing has changed. You shouldn't have read it. Stay mad - what a jerk. Don't let him waltz into your life after 2 months and mess with your head. You are WAY better than that.

Ingore, ignore, ignore. Don't give him any satisfaction in a reply - and more importantly don't take a step backwards.

Bodhi

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-20-2009
Mon, 07-19-2010 - 12:14pm

Of course the Vets are going to ask how he got an email through. And if it's impossible to completely block, then why did you even read the email? And then... why are you even considering replying to it?

You don't need 48 hours to figure out what to do; you already know what to do.

P.s. - ugh. Your X is a real selfish, ego-centered sh*tbad, isn't he? You were such a meanie taking the right path and not supporting his "tough" decision to lay low so that he could continue to f over his wife and you at the same time! (sarcasm spasm!)

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-24-2008
Mon, 07-19-2010 - 12:19pm
Hi Alice. I would most definitely not dignify that email with any response. It still about him and playing the blame game (which you are made to look like the baddie). I am not familiar with your story, is there a way to change your email or block him?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2009
Mon, 07-19-2010 - 12:27pm
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2010
Mon, 07-19-2010 - 12:32pm

<<<>>>

You still ARE doing well :)

Bodhi

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2010
Mon, 07-19-2010 - 12:33pm

hey Alice,

Can relate woman - I wonder if you read the email wondering if this was going to be 'the one' ... you know that fantasy email that 'we' (maybe only me) sometimes imagine getting, where they profess their remorse, shame, blah blah without blame & justification - take responsibility and accountability. Is that why you checked? Did you have hopes you were getting 'the one'? (BTW: I do not believe any such email would be healing IN THE LEAST - i KNOW closure comes from within, not out).

Anyway, there is no response but to continue NC. Isn't it sad that he is still stuck believing that this is just about you being 'angry'? They just don't get it. My xAP sent me an email a couple of months ago saying that "he was sorry I didn't understand what was happening". wtf? If he was to send me an email to me today - it would be a carbon copy of the email you got.

Hugs,

TU.

LC/NC since April 14, 2010

"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it."
— Maya Angelou

LC/NC since April 14, 2010

"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it."
— Maya Angelou
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2010
Mon, 07-19-2010 - 12:39pm

HI Alice-


I've been wondering about you. I am glad to hear you've been sticking to NC. This email from your xap enrages me. What an a&^. Classic fishing attempt. YOu know you can't respond. The best thing to do is just let it go... I know that is easier said than done, but you will be glad you didn't respond in a couple days. I use the 48 hour rule to put myself in check... and I am glad to hear you are doing that too. This email should reiterate for you just how much you don't need him in your life. What scum.


Jane
NC/LC since January 28, 2010
http://secretlifeofjane.wordpress.com/
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2009
Mon, 07-19-2010 - 1:03pm
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-24-2008
Mon, 07-19-2010 - 1:05pm
He sent it to your work email??? That really shows how pompous he is. My exAP sent an email to a joint account to break NC. Amazing what they pull.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-2009
Mon, 07-19-2010 - 2:49pm

Alice,


He is selfish honey. He is setting it up so you will validate him back with an email that professes your attraction to him and that you missed him too.


Now that he is no longer under the watchful eye of his W and his leash is a little longer, he wants his ego fed. Maybe things are a little distant at home and he knows right where to go to get a little attention.


We can never really save face when things go rancid in A-land. I think back about how I always wanted to explain to my XMM how Im not really this crazed insecure lunatic who followed him around and questioned his every move. Im really the opposite...and under normal circumstances would drop any man who showed the same personality traits that he did. I went from boiling rabbit ready in late April to

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