Ugh, now I have to work with him :(

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2009
Ugh, now I have to work with him :(
12
Sun, 10-04-2009 - 9:18pm

As you can see from my siggy it's been a good while since I ended my A. I have not gone back and there has been no physical contact or an EA. NC is impossible because we work at the same company, so it's been mostly NC with a few confrontations.

Well, now I have been thrown into a project that he is the sponsor of. As sponsor he has to oversee everything that is going on for the project. As you can imagine he is milking this opportunity - sending work emails I have no choice but to respond, singling me out in conference calls so I have to engage with him. In between work emails he tried to sneak in personal references to the A, calling me by the pet name he used before, telling me I am hot. I did not respond to any of those and only responded to work stuff. This weekend he sent me a couple of non-work emails (just hey and a smiley face, that type of thing) and I did not reply.

I am trying my best not to get angry again but it's hard. I can't filter his emails anymore now because of the project. It upsets me when I get non-work stuff snuck in; I mean for eff's sake it's been almost 8 MONTHS can't you get the message, little man????? It's almost like he wants to torment me or something. I just think it's a sick thing to do.

Thanks for letting me vent. I assume that eventually he will stop it with the personal references, please can someone who has been out of the A for a long time and has to work with their xAP please tell me it all stops at one point and they go away after something else. I am so ready to be out with the old and in the with new, and now the old is back to haunt me.

xoxo

trixie



"Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it is about learning to dance in the rain.”
Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it is about learning to

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2009
Mon, 10-05-2009 - 6:55am

Hey Trixie! hope you're doing ok (apart from the irritating xAP still 'buggin' you) maybe we could invent some kinda insect repellant for unwanted attention from xAP's? We could call it ex-STINKED?!! Any how, no advice just wanted to drop you a hi.

Lots a ((hugs)) Roxy :-) x

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2005
Mon, 10-05-2009 - 9:48am

Hey Trixie :)


If I were you, I'd make a point of talking to him when you are in a private moment/area


iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2009
Mon, 10-05-2009 - 11:50am

Hi Clarity,

Thanks much for the help. He was dumb enough to use work email to bug me so I sent him an email response on work email telling him to STOP, and that I was feeling harassed by the UNWANTED attention. Just 2 sentences. This way if he continues I have some proof that I can use if I choose to go to my boss or HR.

He hasn't answered back so I think I scared him with the 'h' word!

hugs,

trixie xo



"Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it is about learning to dance in the rain.”
Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it is about learning to
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2009
Mon, 10-05-2009 - 11:52am

Ex-stinked - lol - thanks for the laugh this morning, Roxy!! hope you are doing well, too.

xoxo and hugs!!!

trixie


Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it is about learning to
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2009
Mon, 10-05-2009 - 1:59pm

Hey Trixie,
Just wanted to let you know that I hope your xAP will stop bothering you :-( It's so easy to fall again for his moves, I think you are handling this very well!!!!!

hugs
htgo

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2009
Mon, 10-05-2009 - 3:05pm

Hey Trixie -


I am so sorry that you have to put up with this.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-17-2009
Mon, 10-05-2009 - 7:23pm

You GO Trixie!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2009
Tue, 10-06-2009 - 10:01am

Hi Sara :) thanks much for the encouragement.

Using the 'h' word totally worked - after a couple of hours Little Man sent me this letter of 'apology' with a lot of disingenuous BS and lies - total butt-covering (I didn't reply to the email). Then he completely disappeared. I don't care about what's in his email, the important thing is that he leaves me alone. I'm on a mission to get him completely out of my life in order to make room for a new man eventually!

I know it really worked because this morning instead of continuously walking by my office and 'accidentally' bumping into me when I go get coffee, Little Man is keeping to himself. I hate having to do this but I deserve to be left in peace, and my need for peace supersedes his need to keep trying to contact me for whatever stupid reason, lol :)

happy Tuesday ladies,

trixie xo



"Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it is about learning to dance in the rain.”
Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it is about learning to
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2008
Tue, 10-06-2009 - 12:56pm

Hi Trixie,


You are doing extremely well in a tough situation. All I can

Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-23-2008
Tue, 10-06-2009 - 1:45pm

Hey Trixie :)


"Little Man" makes me laugh. That kind of thinking will give you continued success.


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