Urgent! Need u BAD! MY Physical Health!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2010
Urgent! Need u BAD! MY Physical Health!
13
Fri, 02-12-2010 - 5:45pm

I am crying and shaking as I type this please excuse typos gramma etc... I have no one to talk to.

Luvin
Yo Soy EL Capitan de Mi Vida

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2007
Sat, 02-13-2010 - 8:53pm
I hope your sonogram goes well :) I understand about the choice taken away from you... sure does suck even though you wern't planning anymore kids. It stings because his actions and control had an impact on you that you have no control over. Health is such a fragile thing. :(
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2009
Sun, 02-14-2010 - 2:36am

Awe I'm here for you, you're not alone and never 'lost'. Please, please don't beat yourself up too much over this affair. I'll address the lies he told you by saying you're not alone. You and I are much more alike because we were both lied to in the beginning and I think this is what 'separates' us from the other girls on here. It is much more of a 'shocker' to find yourself in an 'affair' when in our 'minds' we thought it was just the two of us... it feels like he cheated on us, but in actuality he never did...we feel betrayed but in actuality, we are the accomplice.

Sociopaths are skilled in making you feel loved. My xAP told me how much he loves kids and he too convinced me to have sex without a condom (I think we learn this in high school but apparently we were too deep in the fog to remember the warnings), and he too would say things like he wanted to have kids with me...and how he dreamt we had 5 boys together. Or how he planned on introducing me to his mother as his 'future wife'. Even thou during all this his wife was pregnant!

These men ARE SICK! They really, really are mentally sick, and I'm not just sayin' it.

As for your health. Please do get tested. Follow up with your doctor. Listen and take your doctors help. Go to Planned Parenthood I know they help if you don't have insurance or they can tell you where to go. Your health is serious, its for you and your children.

It may not be something 'big' and it may be curable but you have to get tested to know this. I'll prey for you and keep you i my thoughts.

I wish I could help you and I wish I could say something that will make this all better. =( Truth be told, you and I both know how bad it feels to be lied to, then to find out he's a serial cheater AND he bad mouths you afterwards (remember mine said all those nasty things on myspace about me).

p.s Karma does go around. In my case, I got my small revenge by talking to his wife. Althou that hasn't really helped because she took him back. But anyway, point be, these men will get what they deserve in the end. Like the other poster said, refocus your energy on YOU. What has helped me get over the anger is not thinking about it. Easier said then done, but I just try to pretend he never existed in my life. Really that is the best revenge to wish him away.

I also think that when something 'major' hits us (like your health) we feel vulnerable and we 'want' to lean on someone for help; or support. That when we're single feels more lonely when we don't have someone. So we tend to think of our ex. Just know that he doesn't need to know and it will only be worse if he did know. By doing this on your own (& with our help ;) you will come out of it stronger because you know you have survived on your own. =)

Hope that made sense. :/




Edited 2/14/2010 2:45 am ET by llostagain

NC since Dec. 9th 2009

No Contact = No N

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2009
Sun, 02-14-2010 - 8:34am

Luvinme,

<>

Can't speak for the others, but I'm doing well. Just trying to stay warm and not notice the white stuff coating the city. Ugh! Also I might mention that I am so happy V-Day fell on a weekend. Xmm and I won't have to tip toe around each other at work and pretend the day doesn't exist. ;-)

I was happy to read you are having a better day. Hug your children and be ever so thankful for these blessings. Mine are all grown and have children of their own now. I also wish you luck with your sonogram and that everything will be just fine. I was an hour away from having a hysterectomy after the birth of my first child and it's difficult for me to think back on those days. I apologize for not posting in sooner, but the wonderful, caring gals on here have taken good care of you.

You are admired and loved,

~ Iddy~

   ~Iddy~ 


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