The W keeps contacting me
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| Thu, 01-13-2005 - 12:26pm |
I know that by having and A with someone in my own circle of friends was really dumb......but now that it is ended I am faced with dealing with xMM wife calling me to do things alot more.
She called me at home last night just to say hello and to see what plans I had for the coming weekend.
I asked if she was doing better than last week, and she said some things that really got me upset - again.
She said that she and her H have been sleeping in the same bed now for a month - but no IC.
But - for the last 2 nights they held hands while they went to sleep.
My stomach dropped and I felt dizzy and all the pain came crashing back - He said that he was unhappy -
Am I making too much of this?
She also said that he was upset with her because she has cocktail functions after work - and they are work related.......reps from the company she works for are in town for the week and dinner and drinks are part of the job. she said that he said that he wants her not to go out with these guys and pouted.
So she said she only had 2 drinks and was on her way home with dinner. She did not want to make him mad.
I was thinking that that was his guilt feelings - he cheated and now he thinks she will.
Sounds to me like he wants to work on his Marriage - not at all what he tells me and some of our other friends.
She said that she was thinking that the handholding while going to sleep was a sign that things were going to work out.
I did not sleep at all last night - I could not get the thoughts of WHY out of my head.

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Anna,
I hate to tell you this, but obviously, he still has feelings for his wife. I know he tells you that he wants to get divorced, or whatever, and he probably does feel that way....SOME of the time. I'm sure that other times he feels differently. I don't know what it is that you want from him, or expect from him, or think is going to happen with him, but I really suggest, for your own sanity and peace of mind, that you try to move on. The situation you are in is so freakin' hopeless. Sitting there waiting for him to leave is just spinning your wheels. And even if he does leave...that's no guarantee that you're going to end up with him. You're driving yourself nuts with this. Accept the things you cannot change, change the things you can, and have the wisdom to know the difference. You can't change one thing about him and his situation. You can't make him leave, you can't make him want you, you can't make him love her less or not at all, you can't make him love you. But you CAN change yourself and how you're choosing to deal with all of this. Are you going to be a doormat for this guy or a strong, sexy, independent woman who doesn't need to wait around for NO man! To hell with him.
Silly
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