What do I do now. HELP!!!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2004
What do I do now. HELP!!!!!!
2
Tue, 09-28-2004 - 5:29am
For the frist time I saw what I was feeling in words. Two days ago I told my MM that after 4 years of living an undercover live; it was something I just couldn't stand anymore. Yesterday I didn't go to work I stayed in my nightgown all day and cried. He gave me my keys yesterday and we both cried. I'm so hurt. my whole bodie hurts. But I know I caused this on myself. ..I have to go now and put on my "I have to go to work face and attitude. You know act like life is a big fat ball of fun." I need some help...please

This pain is too much for me. I just can't stop cring. I really don't know how I'm going to do with out him we spent so much time together. I saw him everyday. talk to him everyday. Pleas someone help me

                                    

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-02-2004
Tue, 09-28-2004 - 9:54am
Twobfree,

Read eveything you can on this site. You will gain momentum with every post and eventually your strength will resume enough for you to fight all of the negatives this "A" was based on. If possible, take a few days off from work (do you work together?) and give yourself time to mourn the death of a very unhealthy, spirit sucking, soul wrenching trama. You have a difficult journey ahead of you, but the benefits of moving forward will far outweight the malefic destruction that you are leaving behind.

You have done the best thing possible for yourself and KNOW that we are here to guide you every step of the way. I am not a hand holder...but I will be the wind upon your back as you continue to thrust yourself forward out of the dark and into the light.

God Speed,

~True~

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2003
Tue, 09-28-2004 - 7:32pm
Twobfree

Hi I am not a hand holder either more of a butt kicker, but We will see what we can do.

You ended it because the pain of continuing to be his secret had hit critical mass and blow up in your heart, so I think even if you were to relapse it would not last for long.

I am not going to kid you this is not going to be quick or easy but if you do what you have to and cut off all relationship with him and that does mean as much NO CONTACT as possible then it will get better.

If possible transfer to an area away from him or even go so far if reasonable and possible as to change jobs.

Close all his normal channels of communications only with no contact can you begin to heal and to reclaim your REAL LIFE.

Post and read, journaling can help vent the emotions.

Free