What do you do when you're feeling bad?
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What do you do when you're feeling bad?
| Mon, 03-01-2004 - 3:41pm |
Not that far into NC and having real trouble concentrating or enjoying anything. Any tips? What do you all do when you're having a bad moment or day?

Here are some things that have helped me:
1. Talk on the phone...I have one friend that I've been able to confide in and she's been an incredible support.
2. Started taking a stained glass class. This is something I wanted to do but didn't ever take the time. Again, it was my friend that helped me realize that now was the time to do it and even took the class with me.
3. Read. "How to Survive the Loss of a Love" by Peter McWilliams has been somewhat helpful. Otherwise, I've tried to read interesting non-love-story books. I've been enjoying Lee Child and David Baldacci lately.
4. Catch up with friends that I haven't communicated with for a while. It's even kind of nice to have to put up a front of being happy since most of these people would be appalled if they understood that you were unhappy because you'd had an affair.
5. Sleep. When all else fails, I take a nap. Sometimes things just look better after a rest. (Unfortunately I have trouble sleeping when I'm stressed or unhappy so this doesn't always work.)
6. Make a list. This was recommended to me by my therapist. Make a list of the bad things about the affair. It's amazing how many things were negative but I was letting the "good" things overshadow the bad. It's also amazing how quick I was to justify his "bad" actions by thinking that he only did those things because of the "situation." Maybe that's true, but the whole point is that there were a lot of things about the relationship that were making me unhappy.
7. Make another list. This list should be things that you truly are..your authentic self. I have been amazed at how I've let myself change because of this relationship. For example, I'm a confident, independent woman...but haven't acted that way during the end of this affair.
Good luck.
Jazzdiva
F