What do you say to yourself?
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What do you say to yourself?
| Tue, 02-08-2011 - 4:17pm |
There are quite a few Newbies here and some not-so-newbies who have shown some signs of struggling. There is so much hope here at EAS, otherwise we wouldn't be hanging around, would we? I know that in four months, I have learned so much about myself, about affairs, about my responsibility and role, and how to heal.
There are so many tools to find here to help one along in their journey. One of things I did/do a lot of when I was/am feeling down, is to repeat certain phrases that for some reason, really had an impact on my thinking.

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Hi Always,
Good idea for
As a newbie, maintaining NC is still my biggest challenge and I couldn't have done it without the tried-and-true:
1. Silence is dignified. Silence is heard.
2. No new contacts means no new hurts.
I also imagine myself at the end of my life, looking back on the decisions I made, and try to make sure that the choices I make from now on in are choices that I can be proud of.
And for overcoming sadness or self-pity, there's nothing like deciding to "act the way you want to feel" which usually starts with singing one of my kids' favourite happy songs "If you're happy and you know it ... " or "I love you, you love me, we're a happy family" (after all these years of tertiary education you might think I could come up with something slightly more sophisticated, but at this point in my life, all that really matters is that it works!)
NC = NNH was a mantra for me the first few days.
I tell myself that I cannot use another person to see myself through my low moments. I realize alot more clearly how I did that alot, use someone to get me through my bad times. I never did any work myself to discover who I am and how I could change my ways to make myself better. I am working on finding that healthy balance of when to seek support and when to look at myself for my answers:)
This is great Always, my mantras:
* I will not disrespect myself, my H or my sons anymore;
* I will not allow JAM disrespect me, my H or my sons anymore;
* I belong, body and soul, to my H only;
* I am going to protect my dignity and integrity.
Alwayst2...thanks for posting this.
1. NC = No New Hurts (God that is so true!)
2. This was always going to end
3. I wouldnt want him even if I was single- he doesnt hold a candle to my H
4. I am better than that
5. I have the best family in the world, they deserve the best me I can be
Iggy x
Vanessa,
"Out of mind" experience!!! I love it. Sooooooo true. As in "I must have been out of my freakin mind." Great mantra.
xo
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