what we missed and not missed in A
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| Sun, 02-13-2005 - 12:51am |
hi all,
im watching TV and just thought of this
that i dont miss her constant ignoring me, that i dont missed being told that she cpuld not spend time with me, that i dont miss her telling me that i cannot call her or test her on the weekends, that i dont miss her making me think and imagine what the heck she is doing on the weekends, that i dont miss her lies to me, she would go out for drinks after work with her co-workers but she cannot with me, that i dont miss her telling me she has some work to do when i talk to her for about 5 minutes but i can see her talking to other guys for like 1 hr, ( i hate her for doing that) ... there are more things that i dont miss anymore
i dont miss her not giving me anything in return emotionally when i give her all i have
my head is hurting and im upset at her now
what do i miss about her ??? hmmm i cant think of anything right now, maybe im refusing to think of it for now, earlier i was itching to text or email her
max
max

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MS
A man's got to do what a man's got to do.
A woman must do what he can't.

MSMax
Sounds like you don't like being a convenience, perhaps you are experiencing the beggining of clarity were she is concerned.
Free
free,
looks like it, the mind is beginning to see the fog but my heart is still blind, false hope maybe, i dont know, she still occupies must of my heart, making me think of her but my mind is not letting me do it anymore
she took me for granted i think, i was there for her whenever she needed, i dont know why she never did acknowledge me that much
Free, how r u doing ? how did u get this strong, i hope to learn from your experience and apply it to my own
thanks,
max
yes im still wide awake and cant sleep, im so sorry, i hate her now ( not a good word to describe how i feel towards her but i cannot think of any word, maybe upset or pissed off for ending the affair)
hi M,
i saw that the affair has done me more pain than joy, the thing is when we are together whatever we are doing i am so happy, i feel so alive and then when she leaves to go home i feel so sad, i kinda got used to it , i lowered my happiness level i guess, i was willing to go above and beyond for OW, i dont understand is why she could not make the right choice based on the facts presented to her
she opted to stay and make her daughter happy ( according to her) and live in the same house with the dad of her daughter, this i find it hard to believe, i think she is not telling me the truth, which is helping me actually right now coz i realize which might not be telling me the whole truth
she tell me sometimes that there is no need for me to know all since i dont own her, what kind of concept is that, i never said i own her, i dont own anyone at all, she would always not tell me stuff, i told myself that what i dont know wont hurt me, i guess it did not, it got hurt, i was expecting more and my expectations where too high, i think she never realy wanted to be with me, maybe she just used me ( i dont want to think of it) she never asked me for anything, she even gave me some stuff
funny is she never said she cared for me, i would asked her early on if she cares for me and she would answer that she is with me and thats is more than enough for me, we never get to do a lot of stuff , normal stuff, very seldom, we always have sex, its almost 90% of the time when we are together, i wanted to do more
sorry for rambling ....... im getting anxious again coz it the workweek, i need to get better and resist her at work and not seek her out, she is evil !!!!!!!
im so sorry , im never a hateful person, never angry but she is making me feel this way, sad and upset at the same time, so much mixed emotions that i am having a very hard time processing my thoughts
i need a plan for tomorrow and the rest of the week on how to conduct myself at work
- also i am actively looking for another job
max
Max
Based on your posts on the ASB, I long ago arrived at the conclusion that your XMW was little more then a player and that her child was just a means of manipulating you, she had her cake and was able to eat it to as they say.
Time for you to look out for number one Max, don't let fear of rejection keep you locked into the place your at today.
Date Max there are lots of nice single women who would love to meet a nice kind caring man.
Free
Free,
its hard to believe and i still refuse to believe, but now i think u are right, still part of me refuse to believe it, its my heart but now i think u have hit the nail right on
i just want to get over her and make sure i dont let her back anymore, i am slowly seeing the light and i think she was using me, im pissed off at her actually, now that i can see more clearly
btw, where are u geographically, anyone here from Northern CA., specifically the San Francisco bay area
i know u are right Free, i cant wait for the day i will be able to thanks u and tell u you are 110% right on the money
I'm from Southern Cali, but I LOVE hanging out in Frisco. I don't have any friends out there, but a friend of mine likes to go every once in a while and I tag along with him whenever I can. He and I are strictly platonic friends, I'm not his type at all and he is not my type.
Do you have an ivillage email addy?
u can send email to me at
fil_d90@yahoo.com
btw, never say Frisco to the locals or they will go nuts
max
as Herb Caen would say ( famous SF writer)
we are the Bagdhad by the Bay
max
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